Watch GTA Sanandres jokes. Secrets and jokes of GTA: San Andreas part 7

Was once very popular. But even today, many fans play it in co-op mode and even play the single player campaign. However, few people realize about the jokes in GTA: San Andreas, with which the game is simply teeming. This article will present the best of them.

Jokes in the translation of "GTA: San Andreas"

Everyone knows how this game was translated into Russian. It’s just that the existing text in the dialogues was pushed into the translator. Moreover, no one even checked the quality and correctness of the translation. The result was complete trash with translation, so the dialogues of the game’s heroes were not only incomprehensible to anyone, they were meaningless. But from individual words one could guess what the characters were talking about.

The translation is the first joke. Here are examples of jokes in GTA: San Andreas without swearing in dialogues:

1. "She's with me, carbon fiber";
2. "You don't want me to point a gun at your face";
3. “I am considering its benefits”;
4. “I knock the man over, you move.”

There are many similar translations; the whole game is literally teeming with them. Some are so funny that they have already become memes on the Internet. However, due to censorship, many jokes cannot be written, because there is a lot of swearing in them. Look for them in the game itself.

The secret in GTA: how to get rich quick

It is not at all necessary to complete missions or write codes to receive money. There is a very real working way to get rich in the gaming world. North of the center of Los Santos there is a village where a bookmaker's office is located (according to the plot main character he even robs her). Save close to it, bet all your money on the highest odds. If you lose, then download again and do this operation until you win. Did you win? You can save again and try to win again. In just 30 minutes you can turn one thousand dollars into one hundred thousand. You can win money at horse races in the same way, although the odds are lower there, so you will have to spend more time.

There is also another interesting joke in GTA: San Andreas. There is a mission where you need to rob a gas station. After the robbery, your customer offers to work for him. Agree. The work will consist of transporting gasoline and will be paid depending on the duration of the work, and for some reason the time does not end.

Mission with a pimp

There is a mission in the game where you need to kill a pimp. The problem is that when he leaves in a car, it is extremely difficult to catch up with him. And many players failed to catch up and kill him. But there is another way: his car is parked in front of the club at the beginning of the mission. Shoot the tires and go to the club. When the pimp jumps out of the establishment and gets into the car, he will barely drive due to the bullet holes in the wheels.

Infinite Shotgun Ammo

There is a glitch in the game that allows you to get a lot of shotgun shells. In a driving school you have to take the lesson “Pit Maneuver” in a police car. If you fail, you automatically receive 5 rounds. Fail the test 10 times and get 50 ammo.

UFO in the game

An equally interesting joke in "GTA: San Andreas" is a UFO. Las Venturas has a little-noticed tavern called Lil' Prob. In front of her is a stand with a UFO. Inside this tavern are many photographs of people who, as they themselves claim, saw a UFO. And in the office building there is actually a studio for intercepting and detecting UFOs. There is also a map with notes where eyewitnesses saw the flying saucer.

Airport pass

You need to approach San Fiero Airport from the rear entrance. There will be a Super GT car on the right. Take a photo of it and the left gate to enter the airport will open. This way you can enter the airport even without a pilot's license.

Jokes in "GTA: San Andreas": what weapons can be found for sale?

If anyone has seen Quentin Tarantino's film, he probably remembers interesting scene, where the hero Bruce Willis (Butch) was tied up. However, he later freed himself and went to save his enemy, Marcellus. So, when Butch was choosing a weapon in the store (and it was in the store that all this happened), he had a difficult choice: a hammer, a baseball bat, a chainsaw and Samurai sword. Ultimately, he chose a samurai sword. A similar set is sold in the gun shop of the GTA game. Coincidence?

Other jokes

If you take a police car and go to the police garage, you can see two police officers beating a man. This is an unusual phenomenon for the world of San Andreas.

Everyone knows about the military base in the northeast of Las Venturas. Only military vehicles can enter, and the gates of this base are bulletproof. If you get 2 wanted stars in a city and quickly return to this base, then police cars will first arrive, and a little later the cops will appear right next to you and outside the fence of the base. They will all run after you in a crowd, but... they are behind the grid, they cannot do anything. By the way, given that there is closed airspace above the military base, police helicopters don’t even fly there.

If you jump down from a huge skyscraper on a bicycle and land on both wheels, the character will not die or even get hurt.

The jokes in "GTA: San Andreas" don't end there. There are a lot of unusual places and posters that deserve attention.

Jokes in the game "GTA: San Andreas": places and inscriptions

Does everyone know where the gym is in the game? If you walk east from it, and then turn left into the alley, and then walk a little forward and settle down, you can see an interesting sight: people come to the edge of the roof and freeze.

There is such a place in the game - Tinder's farm. Before entering the farm there are signs with various warnings written on them. Translated from English, the signs read: "No entry. Violators will be shot. Survivors will be shot again."

There's a cool garage in Las Venturas that says Welding and Weddings. Because they sound similar. Translated it means: "Welding and weddings. They just sound the same."

There is a strange gym in San Fierro. Near it hangs a sign with a cobra, and under it you can see the inscription Marital Arts. It's supposed to say Martial Arts, which means " Martial arts", but in fact it says "Matrimonial Arts". And this is not a mistake. Inside the gym there is exactly the same inscription.

There is another interesting joke in GTA 5 "San Andreas". In the cinema of the same San Fierro, the same film is constantly shown, called The Wizard of Ass. Translated this means "Wizard of the Ass". Most likely, this is how the developers played on the title of the film The Wizard of Oz.

The building with the poster is located north of Dorothy. The poster says New Store Open Soon, a little lower on the same poster it says Six more floors of Khakis. However, the last 2 letters are covered with white paint, and this changes the meaning of the translation. It was: “6 floors of Khaki left.” It became: “6 floors of crap left.”

Another joke from the world of GTA is an advertising poster gym, which reads: Train Hard, which means in translation: “Train hard.” But someone added the letter "S", which greatly changes the meaning. The poster now reads Strain Hard.

Also, the state is full of advertising banners that say Big S. It reads Big ass, which translated means “Big ass.” There is another interesting advertising banner that mocks the game True Crime. It says True Grime: street cleaners (real cleaning). It hangs at Unity Station.

Conclusion

These are not all the jokes about GTA: San Andreas. The game is simply teeming with a wide variety of " Easter eggs", secrets and glitches that players turn to their advantage. In addition, different missions can be completed in different ways. Although for modern games this is normal, but at one time it was a sensation. This is precisely why fans like this game so much and so many years later they still play it, make new modifications and even port it to smartphones.

You can write separately about cheat codes for this game, but this is not entirely relevant to this topic. But playing with cheat codes feels completely different. The familiar San Andreas is changing beyond recognition, so many fans recommend going through it several times: the first time according to the plot, without codes, the second - with cheat codes and a detailed study of the game world.

Evolution of cards in GTA

The 1997 game will not surprise us now with the large scale of its map, a typical GTA square map with bridges and several cities.

In the second game in the series, the card system was changed, now instead of one there were three cards at once. This does not mean that there is three times more space, as we would like.

If few people played the first two games and remember the cards, then this one remains at least a little in their memory. 3.5 square criminal miles.

I remember these beaches; the island where the filming takes place; mansion. An ingenious card designed to never be forgotten.

A whopping 5.67 square miles of gaming joy.

Gta San Andreas

San Andreas had the most best card among the entire series, not counting the fifth GTA, of course. We were given three huge cities, among other things, there were a bunch of different villages, fields, mountains, forests. Here everything could be memorized intuitively. It’s not for nothing that they say about GTA that they know them better than their own city. To be precise, it's about 13.9 square miles or 36 square kilometers.

GTA4 maps look a little more modest after the previous version of the game. We have been spared the village fun, now we have cities at our disposal, or more precisely, the same Liberty City, familiar to us from the first game in the series. Only 6.8 square miles.

It has already been said that the GTA V map looks like a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. I don’t think so, if only in size, since it is definitely not huge, as it was previously imagined.

Judging by the inscriptions and my careful analysis, we will be in the city of Los Santos from San Andreas (the first city in the game). That is, the GTA 5 map consists of one city out of three San Andreas. Does this mean that the map is three times smaller than San Andreas? No.

The city is more detailed and the surroundings have been changed, there are even more side and more detailed forests. If you believe the mathematicians from Pikabu, then the ZhTA 5 map has an area of ​​51.33 square miles, and this is almost 3.5 times larger than the setting in everyone’s favorite San Andres.

by armchair theorist

Guide on cases of change/deprivation of gameplay (by Champion2008)

In GTA: San Andreas there are several cases when something in the game can “break”, that is, it will not go exactly as planned by the developers. This may be due to glitches in the game or to the subtlety of some scripts that can easily be broken.
In this small guide, I want to talk about such cases, and also describe what needs to be done to prevent the consequences.

Stay forever

1. Changes to gang territories

When: Any time

When flying far beyond the map in the game, changes occur to the territories of the gangs: they change locations, their number and affiliation increase.
If you do not want the standard position of the gangs to be changed, then it is better to refrain from flying outside the map.
I also note that by using map flights, you can increase the number of gang territories by 11. ()

10. Basketball


When: After the mission A Home in the Hills

After completing this mission, we will have the opportunity to save in Madd Dogg's mansion, but we should not do this, otherwise the opportunity to play Basketball will be forever lost.

11. Thermal vision device

13. Lost paintjob at the car

Sometimes when opening a garage, a car may lose paintjob. If this happens, you can return paintjob only by reloading the save where it was, or by installing it again in a car repair shop.

14. Invisible car

The cause of this glitch is unknown. A car appears in the garage, which is only listed in it and takes up space, but it is not in the game. On this moment no in-game way to remove such an invisible car from the garage has been found. Therefore, if you encounter such a glitch, download a backup or delete it using the garage editor.

As you have already noticed, Grand Theft Auto– game with open world and complete freedom of action. Now all that remains is to figure out what to do with all this goodness. And believe me, many players found a large number of jokes in GTA San Andreas that will occupy your attention for a while. Many of them are a consequence of various bugs and shortcomings of the game, but there are some that the developers left on purpose.

“Hostage to the fence” - this can be repeated like this:
1. We go to the Johnsons’ apartment and drive the car right into the fence.
2. Leave the car where it is.
3. We go into the house and save.
4. After everything, go outside.
5. Oh, miracle! The car is forever nailed to the fence.

“I’m on duty, please don’t disturb me.” It happens that a gang of opponents attacks your territory, but you are completely reluctant to fight it off. To avoid war, get into any official vehicle (police, fire or ambulance) and get to work (key 2 by default). That's it, the bandits have retreated, and the area still belongs to you.

"Headless Horseman" You can observe this phenomenon only in the mission “Reconciliation of Families”, when you are being chased and you get the place of the shooter. Try to hit the driver of the police car in the head. If you are accurate, you will see that the policeman has died, but the car continues to pursue you and even smoothly enters turns.

"She's not real!" - it's about the moon. If you look at the moon through optics and start firing at it, it, in turn, will begin to change in size.

Topic: Comparisons.
Everyone knows that Grand Theft Auto 4 (GTA 4) is the city of Liberty City. Consisting of three parts. Some buildings, structures, vehicles, as well as attractions are similar to other GTA games. For example, Grand Theft Auto 3 (GTA 3) is the same city (Liberty City), which also consists of three parts. Also in GTA 4 there is an elevated metro and one airport. There is a similar similarity to GTA3 in that you can't fly big planes. But we're not talking about GTA 4, but about GTA 3 and GTA San Andreas and about another game that has some similarities with GTA.
GTA San Andreas. San Andreas is not a city, but most likely some part of five islands, which consists of three cities, as well as rural and desert areas. There is one difference in this compared to GTA 3. But this is only a little. The buildings and transport have the same similarities. Some cars are simply taken from GTA 3. Two bridges in San Andreas leading from (San Fierro) to the desert, are very similar to the bridge that is in GTA 3. Another slight similarity is at airports. In the game GTA San Andreas, there is an airport in the city (San Fierro). If you look at it from above, you can see that there is water around the runway. Accordingly, it is also around the airport itself. In GTA 3 there is one airport that has two runways with water around them. But the most important thing is not that this airport has two runways, unlike the one in San Fierro. The main thing is that it is the stripes that are in the water. A very similar picture.
By the way, there is also one airport in GTA Vice City, and it is very similar to the one in GTA 3. Some vehicles from GTA Vice City are taken to GTA San Andreas. But there is no need to compare the game GTA Vice City. Since this one is sharp, it consists of two large parts and small ones next to them. In principle, there are similarities in transport, buildings, etc. But the map is not similar. In addition, there are no trains in this city. But GTA 3 and GTA San Andreas have trains. If you look at these two cards, you can see how it leads Railway for all three parts in GTA 3 and for all three cities in GTA San Andreas. Unfortunately, the railway is not marked on my map from GTA 3, but anyone who has played it knows. In addition, GTA 3 has an underground and overground metro. The one that leads through all three parts of the city is underground, and the one that leads around the first part of the city (Portland) is aboveground. There is no metro in GTA San Andreas, but there is an ordinary railway that leads through all three cities of this island. There is also a tram line that goes around San Fierro. By the way, there are some similarities in GTA 3 in the first part of the city (Portland), and in the second city in GTA San Andreas, (San Fierro). There is a similar picture in the save files of these cities. In GTA 3 in (Portland) there is a save game. This is the very first save, which is given at the very beginning of the game. This is the picture. The overground metro is nearby, and so is the station itself. You can run to it, get up and get on the train, and ride around (Portland), just like that. Also behind the storage room, there is an underground metro nearby. But you’ll only be able to ride it when the second part of the city opens. But if it were available, you could ride it around the entire city (Liberty City). Now the picture San Andreas. In (San Fierro) there is a storage facility in the form of a former gas station, which is located opposite the train station. There are also trams there. Of course, if you go to this station, you can sit down and ride around all three cities in the entire part of San Andreas. If you could take a tram, you could ride it around the city (San Fierro). The results are very similar. So, if you imagine this as in GTA 3, then it will turn out: in GTA 3 there is a bridge that leads from the first part of the city to the second. Everyone knows that at the very beginning of the game this bridge is blown up, as a result there is no access to that part of the city. But in San Andreas It may turn out that two bridges there will be closed. It turns out a very very similar picture. Now about the main thing. Since we're on the topic of gaming hours, let's look at the next game. This game is not from the GTA series, but from the NFS series. This is Nid For Speed Underground 2 (NFS 2). What is similar in it to the two GTA games under consideration: GTA 3 and GTA San Andreas, this will be discussed further.

GTA SA (San Andreas)
At the very beginning of the game, you are given a tuned car, in which you need to get to the car shop and buy your own car, on which you will need to play most of the game. Of course you can’t walk there, you can only drive cars. And you can save there only depending on the completion of a race or the acquisition of any spare parts for a car, as well as just like that in any place. So the similarities are as follows: when it appears, the first part of the city (Bayview) will be opened in the very center. There is an overground metro in the center. There is such a picture in GTA 3. There are also trains and planes. One airport, which is located not far from the city center. If you look closely at the airport building, you can see its resemblance to the airport building in GTA Vice City. Accordingly, planes fly at this airport. However, the difference with GTA 3 is that in GTA 3 the planes fly in a circle. They take off at the airport, make a circle over the city (Liberty City) and land back at the airport, then they turn around and fly in again, and so on constantly. In NFS 2, planes fly differently. One plane takes off, flies to a certain point and disappears, and then reappears at the airport and takes off again. Another plane lands at the airport and, having reached a certain point, disappears, then lands again. Another one is unfolding at the airport itself. Turned around, disappeared and turns around again. Here's the trick. As for the elevated metro, it is as unfinished as the planes at the airport. The elevated metro there simply has some sections of tracks along which the train travels, they are simply placed just above the road itself, as if pretending, but outside the road you can see that it ends. The train that travels along these tracks begins to travel from one edge to the other. In addition, the train has no wheels and there are no rails on the same tracks. The question is asked: how do they even drive? By the way, let's mention GTA 4, which has an elevated metro. In this metro, the train is painted with some kind of drawings, i.e. inscriptions. This is also in NFS 2, if you manage to look closely, you can see them. In GTA 3, the elevated metro has a full circle in the city; it travels constantly in this circle, by the way, only along one track. This can be seen in GTA San Andreas, where trains also run only on one track. But with airplanes it’s different. Firstly, they do not take off and land at airports. Secondly, they generally fly along a certain trajectory that appears anywhere. Of course, we won’t see it, we will see a plane flying over it. In general, planes fly there somewhat differently. I fly small planes almost anywhere, but I fly large passenger or cargo planes only in places closer to the airport or in the city itself. This can be seen in GTA 3 and GTA Vice City. But there large planes fly in a circle, and one small plane flies only somewhere in the middle of the city, not like in GTA San Andreas-e everywhere, but only along some given tractor in the middle of the city or outside it. This is not the case in NFS 2. But in the elevated metro the train can travel on two tracks. The same similarities in trains can be seen in this way. In all three of these games we are talking about, the train has three cars. Like in GTA 3 and NFS 2, but in GTA San Andreas the countdown starts from the locomotive and cars at once, i.e. one locomotive and two cars, and sometimes three. In NFS 2, only the elevated metro runs, but trains, even though they exist, don’t move, they just stand still. There are several types of locomotives and carriages, just like in GTA San Andreas.


GTA 3 (Liberty City)
There are also similarities in the ports where the ships are located. As you know, ships do not float in these three games, the only thing is that in GTA San Andreas-e only boats float. The only similarity is in the ships themselves, some of them are simply taken from the games. In GTA San Andreas there are ships taken from GTA 3 and GTA Vice City. In NFS 2, the ships were most likely designed by the developers themselves. Also, these three games have similar cars. This means that only those that drive around the city, as well as those that simply stand, are various trucks, tractors with semi-trailers, and even excavators. There are similarities in that in GTA 3 and NFS 2 there is one airport and one port, in addition they have an overground metro, and most importantly, as soon as you start the game you find yourself in this part where there is an overground metro, one big bridge , the tunnel, in addition, the saves in these two games start from the place that looks like some kind of cargo warehouse. There are several of them in GTA San Andreas: three airports and what looks like two ports. Similarities in bridges and tunnels. In GTA 3, like in NFS 2, there is one large bridge and tunnels that lead to other parts of the city. Only in GTA 3 there is one large tunnel that leads to all three parts of the city and two tunnels that are located in the third part of the city, but these tunnels are always closed, because... this is already the limit of the map, they don’t even have a continuation, just if you look, you can see how both of these tunnels turn off and then the edge of their path, but on the map itself they are indicated as a continuation and that these tunnels should, in theory, lead to those places which are indicated by some city names. Perhaps this was supposed to be a continuation of the map, and therefore the game, but apparently there were some circumstances for this. In NFS 2 there are two tunnels that lead to two parts of the city, but one tunnel is always closed, under the guise of repairs and is not marked on the map, and if you look closely, it is not there at all. But when completing one particular race, it opens, and you can see various buildings in it, as if under repair. In GTA San Andreas it's a little different, but there are elevated highways like in NFS 2, but in GTA 3 only a small part. As you know in GTA San Andreas there is one small town in the countryside. It is in this town that during the mission you need to rob a bank. There is also a destroyed bridge on which you can get a bonus in one direction or the other. It looks like this: in the middle of the bridge there is a chasm in the water, it is raised to the top on both sides, which allows you to jump on a car or motorcycle to the other side and get a bonus, as well as back. The picture looks like this bridge was most likely blown up by some kind of explosive. In NFS 2, there is a highway bridge between the city center and then. If you drive from the port and at the same time look where the elevated railway leads, then on the same bridge, if possible, you can see how this railway bridge breaks off and has no continuation. Here the picture is similar to the fact that perhaps there was an earthquake in this city and the railway bridge collapsed. In GTA 3, the bridge is undermined at the very beginning, but here the reason is clear. After this, it is impossible to get to the other side, because the bridge is slightly lowered down along the edges of the destruction. The car just goes down into the sea.

NFS 2 (Bayview)
In general, these three games have the main similarities in that there are three parts of one main thing. GTA San Andreas has three cities, rural and desert areas. In GTA 3 one city is divided into three parts. In NFS 2 there is also one city divided into three parts, although during the passage this city is divided into five parts. What is most interesting is that in GTA San Andreas everything is divided into five parts, both during the passage and in general the entire area consists of five islands. However, the similarity here is this. In GTA San Andreas, after passing the first city (Los Santos), the countryside opens, and then the second city opens (San Fierro). In NFS 2, after the city center (Center), the next part of the city opens (Old City), and then (Northern Uplands). If NFS 2 was presented as GTA San Andreas, then perhaps it would turn out like this. When passing the first part of the city (Bayview) in the center (Center), the third part (Northern Uplands) would open up, this is a mountainous area. And then the second part of the city (Old City) could open, this is the next part of the city. A slightly similar picture emerges. Although these games have slightly different maps. On the GTA 3 map I don't have the railway road marked. And the NFS 2 card is preliminary. The fact that there are three parts is one thing, but for example in GTA San Andreas it looks like this: this is one part which consists of five islands, on which there are three cities, rural and desert areas. Moreover, all cities are located on the same island with rural or desert areas. When passing, the game is divided into five parts: 1 - Los Santos, 2 - Countryside, 3 - San Fierro, 4 - Desert, 5 - Las Venturas. In GTA 3 (Liberty City): this is a city that consists of three main parts. Two islands and one peninsula, it is not even known whether it is a peninsula or part of one large island, because... this part is not finished. When passing, the game is divided into three parts: 1 - Portland, 2 - Staunton Island, 3 - Coastal Valley. In NFS 2 (Bayview): this is a city that consists of three main parts. All three parts are most likely located on some continent, it is unknown, they are located next to some sea or ocean, right on the very shore, and a river flows through this city. When passing, the game is divided into five parts: 1 - Center, 2 - Old City, 3 - Northern Highlands, 4 - Western Harbor, 5 - Eastern Harbor. The best part is that all three games are very similar in many ways. Everything is very similar: cities, mountainous areas, transport, buildings, structures, etc.
Perhaps there are other games that are in many ways similar to GTA games. But I was just suggesting an example.