What to do if you are broken. If they try to break a person, what should he do? Phrases that morally kill a person for humiliation

There are certain methods, well known to psychologists, that allow you to make any person your like-minded person, friend, or simply push you to the decision you need, but none of these methods will tell you how to psychologically break a person, just how to make him your supporter.

1. Make it a habit to ask.

This rule is also called effect. Once upon a time he needed the approval of a person who was negatively disposed towards him. To win this man over to his side, Franklin very politely asked him for a book. And when he received the book, he thanked him even more politely. This allowed him to break the man and both became friends.

You've probably seen something similar in your life too. If a person has done you a favor, he will do it much more willingly next time than someone who owes you something. The reason for this behavior is simple. If you ask for something, it means that in the future you yourself will respond to the request.

2. Demand more

You can also find this method called “door to the forehead.” First, you need to ask a person for much more than you actually want to get from him. Or, if we are talking about specific things, you can ask for something completely ridiculous, this will allow break a person. Usually such a request is answered with a refusal. After a refusal, you can safely ask for what you needed in the first place. Because of the awkwardness that has arisen, the person most likely will not refuse you, provided that the request is reasonable.

3. Contact by name

According to , addressing your interlocutor by name is extremely important. For every person it given name– the most pleasant combination of sounds. Therefore, when a person is addressed by name, this immediately puts the interlocutor at ease on a subconscious level and makes him experience positive emotions. You manage to break a person and turn him on himself.

A similar effect is observed when a person is addressed with an indication of his rank, title, or rank. How you behave towards a person determines how he will treat you. By calling someone a friend, you can count on the appearance of friendly feelings in return.

4. Flattery

It’s kind of clear what it is. But there are some rules. Flattery cannot be false. If you tell an outright lie, flattery will do harm, not good. According to researchers, people strive to ensure that their thoughts and feelings coincide. For example, speaking flattery to a person with a lot of pride, while demonstrating sincerity, will only get you approval. Your flattery will coincide with the person’s opinion of himself. The same technique with a person with low self-esteem will work exactly the opposite, because psychologically break a person in this case it is possible only by confirming his own thoughts about himself.

5. Reflection

The reflection effect also has another name – mimicry. This effect is often used unconsciously, but it works no worse for it. By copying someone's behavior, manners, gestures, you can achieve favor and psychologically break a person.

People in general tend to treat better those who are similar to them. Moreover, if a person was copied, the effect is somewhat broader - it becomes easier and more pleasant for the person to communicate with other interlocutors. A similar effect is observed as when addressing a person by name.

6. Take advantage of your opponent's fatigue

A tired person is more susceptible to other people's words, requests, and statements. Psychologically break a person It is possible at the moment of his fatigue, at the moment of a low level of mental energy. If you ask a tired person for a favor, they are more likely to agree, rather than having to make the more difficult decision to refuse the request. Moreover, the next day the request will most likely be fulfilled, since a promise was made.

7. Inconvenient requests

To later ask for something important and big, first ask the person for something small and simple. Having once responded to your request, in the future the person will be more willing to make contact. This method allows you to break a person only if there is a certain interval between your requests - at least a couple of days.

8. Listening skills

You shouldn't rub someone's mistakes in their face. You can only get negative response. If you don’t know how to psychologically break a person, first listen to him, try to understand him. Most likely, you will be able to find common ground, even if in general your opinions are opposite. First, agree with your interlocutor, then he will listen to your arguments much more carefully.

9. Repeat after your interlocutor

The easiest way break a person- this is to show your understanding of his point of view. Try to paraphrase his words. By repeating the same thing, but in your own words, you show your complete approval. This technique is called reflective listening. Psychotherapists widely use this technique in their practice.

This technique is easiest to use when talking to a friend. Listen to the phrase, and then repeat it, like your own question - this way the person will see that he is being listened to and will feel comfortable. He will listen to your opinion much more willingly.

10. Nodding

By nodding we usually show that we agree with the interlocutor. Break a man you can simply nod during the conversation. This is another of the effects of mimicry. If you nod during the conversation, listening to the position of your interlocutor, it will be much easier for you to later convince him that you are right.

Good afternoon. They probably write to you a lot of similar things, but I still ask you to pay attention. Help in any way. Please read to the end, it didn’t work out in short.
I’m a guy, I’m less than 24 months old, I graduated from college half a year ago, I’m trying to get back on my feet, find my happiness and arrange my life in the best possible way.
Status on this moment. Apathy alternating with rare bursts of willpower, constant sadness, no peace inside, I don’t feel the taste of life, I lose faith in myself, I feel like a broken person.
From the very beginning.
After entering college, I almost immediately started living with a girl, everything was fine, life went on as usual, there were burning desires to become the best, to achieve much more than others, I could often deny myself my desires and do as needed. The relationship was quite serious; there were plans to take the girl to his city, get married and live, chew good things, and make some money. But... 3 and a half years passed and we broke up on her initiative. Served as motivation.
1I am a leader, she also has to give in to someone in a relationship.
2I am tough and nervous, which seems to be why there were arguments.
3 I am kind and good, but she wants evil and bad.
For me it was a big blow and loss, because for me she was already, like, a dear person, a great friend and a person who inspired me to new achievements.
I know that in such cases it is better to stay further away from the person so that the pain of loss goes away as soon as possible, but the problem was that I studied with her in the same group and we lived in adjacent rooms, it just wasn’t physically possible see each other and not communicate. Subconsciously I wanted to become that bad guy that she would like, to win her back, but on the other hand I wanted to start new life from a clean slate and these two states often changed inside me. I started walking around in the dark, wasting money and getting into debt.
1 month after the separation, I just felt terrible, tossed from side to side, I started having thoughts about suicide, and then it seemed to calm down, I started smiling sometimes, I started to show interest in girls, but he was somehow angry and cruel. Having come to terms with the idea that I simply cannot be on my own, I found a girl, I won’t say that I was delighted with her, it’s just that in this way I was running away from loneliness, melancholy and despondency, a lot of things about her irritated me, lack of intelligence, external data , habits, social circle.
Later I lost interest in her and everyone, I began to absolutely not care about everything and only thoughts about my ex kept me away from spiritual indifference.
Later, for several months I was on my own, continuing to walk, until one morning I woke up and realized that today everything was starting from scratch. Met with beautiful girl seemed very good, kind and with a scar in her heart, just like me. I wanted to be with her Serious relationships, I would resurrect with new strength, open up, start living for her, and in vain... It was all in vain. She just wanted fun and didn’t have anything serious in her mind about me. This completely killed my faith in nice girls, but something prevented me from breaking all ties with her, she left for her ex (I suffered for half a year, I began to pursue her), and my eyes were opened to what kind of person this was, for the first time in my life I wanted revenge, I continued to achieve it, but with a completely different goal. (Once again I was convinced that the girl with whom I lived was almost the best in the world. I had already gotten used to the idea of ​​​​constantly missing her and somehow learned to put up with it. And then I met one little man and realized that I couldn’t miss him, not because she seemed good to me, but simply... I can’t and that’s all... But... she had and still has a civil marriage. And I decided that since it doesn’t work out for the good it will be for the bad, I have completely lost faith in good people that they can treat me kindly, and therefore I should not yield to anyone. And I tried to build happiness on someone else’s grief. The way it started can hardly be called something good. We were lovers, I waited for the moment until she began to get confused in herself, and then at one moment I realized that I could no longer see life without her and wasted... having completely lost my mind, I became as romantic as I could, tried to change in better side, squeezed all the juices out of himself, but so that she wouldn’t know about it. And nothing came of it. (For a year, my nerves were completely shaken. My personality began to burst at the seams, it was gone, with these relationships I finally killed my personality and willpower, since I didn’t solve anything in them. So it turns out now:
1 I'm not one of those who are happy alone
2 I'm tired of putting scars in my heart
3 I’m tired of parting with those who are dear to me and cutting ties with those who are absolutely indifferent to me.
4 I'm tired of living
For 2 and a half years now I just want to live like everyone else. From this time, all my joy in life can be added up into 2 months, another 2 months are so-so, and everything else, melancholy, anger, rage, fear, resentment, disappointment and pain, endless and deep. It already seems to me that the people around me feel this pain and heaviness inside my personality and pass me by.(((
So, from being a leader, I became spiritually poor, weak and defenseless, I try to hide it from people, but the slightest extreme situation betrays me. I don’t sleep, I don’t eat, I can’t work, I let serious people down, and I clearly understand that everyone is the architect of their own happiness, but I have absolutely no strength to try to forge anymore. I’m not a drug addict, I’ve never drank, after about 3 months I don’t drink at all and I’m no longer going to take alcohol for personal reasons, I quit smoking but that’s not the same. At the same time, I’m not a freak, I don’t seem to be stupid, I’m financially secure above the average level, among my peers I always FELT like a step higher, and the last 4 months...

The techniques of dehumanization and transformation of a seemingly normal person into a wretched human-like creature actually combines several themes. Among them is the “Overton Window,” which leads to the understanding that the impossible can become possible and the satanic (aka fascist) methods of dehumanization are the transformation of a person into a weak-willed nonentity, subordinate to the owner who feeds him and morally finishes him off. I often asked myself the question: what motivates people with fascist ideology? Why has the revival of fascism in people’s minds become possible in the 21st century? Is it only the boundless craving for power over people that is the reason? I received answers to many questions by watching the film “The Fifth Seal.”
It has been known from time immemorial that one of the most powerful psychological traumas is humiliation, that is, an attack on the well-being of the inner world through humiliation, suppression, criticism, ridicule, condemnation of what is important for the person himself. Pressure, spread of rot, destructive criticism, slander, suppression and humiliation is a serious blow to a person’s inner peace and well-being, since feelings self-esteem and dignity in the eyes of other people is an important moral value of a person. The formation of basic ideas about the world and people is formed in childhood. A person has a better opinion of himself, based on a system of values ​​instilled by his parents, upbringing in society, self-development and personal moral insights.
Having experienced serious humiliation or a large number of prolonged humiliation, a person’s self-defense systems are activated in order to preserve the integrity of the inner world and self-respect. Humiliated man tries by all means to avoid this in the future, building strategies to protect himself from such situations. This further affects the basic trust in people and in the world as a whole. But it also greatly affects self-esteem and self-respect. Self-respect is the core, the internal support of a person, helping him to survive in a difficult life. When a person realizes that he has lost his way, there is a risk of losing self-respect. Often, self-esteem is robbed of a person by addictions that he cannot control. But there is a much more insidious reason why a person can lose self-respect and self-love. This is an unsuccessful life when a person is psychologically broken by circumstances and other people. There are a number of principles, ideals, a set of internal rules in the field of any person, by breaking which you can lose yourself, which means losing self-respect. This means crossing the line - the point of no return, beyond which the awareness of the disgustingness of what is happening and oneself in it will break the psyche and turn a person into a nonentity. By forcing him to abandon his principles and ideals, the strong-willed core of his personality is broken in a person. And then they mold it, like plasticine, into anything they want. A person trampled by the fascists is not able to resist. It is necessary to maintain ideals in oneself under any circumstances, this is the only chance to remain human.
Fascist elements, delving into the dirty laundry of others, collecting incriminating evidence, trampling on the values ​​of others, find in the reforging of personality a justification for their own baseness.
It has been experimentally proven that in order for a person and the mass of people to be obedient, like sheep, they need to be broken, forcing them to step over the barrier of humanity. The breaking of a person occurs when crossing taboos, through dehumanization, through the release in a person of base traits inherent in the animal world.
Fascist methods of dehumanization are known to everyone - this is the suppression of a person’s sense of self-worth under the pressure of the threat of death. The film "The Fifth Seal" is an example of this.
The main idea of ​​the film: killing a person is a simple matter, but turning him “into something apparently alive, but essentially dead” is much more difficult. People who have suffered torture and humiliation, of course, will fear and hate their tormentors, says the mentor, but “as long as they have at least a glimmer of human dignity, we will achieve nothing.” Without losing self-respect, representatives of this very “majority” are capable of protesting, resisting, and even fighting. And therefore the main goal is “to make them despise themselves. To the point of disgust. And until you achieve this, nothing else matters.”

"CROSS THE LINE"

This technique is described, in particular, in the book by psychologist Bruno Bettelheim, “The Enlightened Heart,” published in the USA in 1960. You can read more about this in the newspaper “The Essence of Time.”

Have you ever thought about how to morally kill a person? I think everyone thought about it. Starting from an early age, when a person encounters the social environment, he begins to experience pressure. Peers test each other's strength, gradually transferring similar behavior into adult life. Someone is leaving these childhood pranks in the past. But there are people who like to humiliate others. How to repel them and forever discourage them from training on you?

How to morally kill a person while maintaining dignity

Let's say an insolent person publicly speaks out, is insulting, sarcastic, makes inappropriate jokes, and mocks in every possible way. The friendly laughter of his friends and those around him can throw anyone off balance. But... this situation can easily be turned against the offender. What does he expect from you? In Russian speaking, bummer. To show their superiority, such people assert themselves at the expense of others. This is a kind of duel: whose spirit is stronger? Now I will list a number of tips on how to morally kill a person in such a situation:

• Keep your cool. A calm, ironic attitude towards attacks sobers up the offender and intrigues observers.
• To offensive questions like “Well, how is it... so and so?” you can simply say: I don’t know, you know this better..
• All nasty things can be turned against the attacker, calmly ironizing his words without dirt or insults. Don't stoop to your opponent's level.
• Observers will quickly lose interest in the incident or even laugh at clumsy attempts to humiliate you.
• Seeing your spiritual superiority and inner strength, the mocker will quickly retreat in search of a weaker victim.

There are situations when we experience treacherous betrayal. Most immediately think about revenge, mentally savoring the details, imagining what they will do in response. But it is much more possible to kill a person morally while maintaining dignity and spiritual nobility. Believe me, squabbles, plans for revenge, and various nasty things in response humiliate you, making you petty. Later it will be unpleasant for you, maybe even ashamed.

It is much wiser to act wisely and carefully. Refute the slander. Make hidden intrigues public. Turn the offender's baseness against himself. The worst thing is public condemnation. However, think a hundred times when punishing others this way: maybe people deserve a second chance?

The best way to kill a person morally is to show him his baseness so that he clearly understands it. Pangs of conscience, mental humiliation, condemnation of others will force you to seriously think about own behavior. Maybe even get better. I wish everyone to be worthy, wise, strong people, capable of repelling any impudent person!

From this useful article you will learn about how to humiliate a person with clever words, without using your fists.
It's a sin to offend good man, remember this.
For any humiliation of the innocent you will have to pay with punishment from above.
But there are often cases when you are smeared against the wall, uttering obscene phrases.
Of course, you can answer the offender in kind or hit him in the teeth with all your might.
But this is not exactly a gentle method, my friends.

It is much more difficult to humiliate a person not by putting him down, but by choosing phrases such that they destroy him in a moral sense.
This is what we will do.

Phrases that humiliate a person for insulting his dignity

If your dignity is questioned, it doesn’t matter who You are a man or a woman, try to answer with these phraseological units:

1). Only a moral impotent or a creature degraded by life can insult a woman.
2). You are throwing insults now because you are stubbornly hiding your own inadequacy.
3). My dignity is not at its best, but it is not at its lowest either. And you reveal yourself to be a weak and morally poor person.
4). Your insults sound like a helpless attempt to prove your superiority.

With these phrases you humiliate a person carefully and delicately. By intelligently omitting it, you yourself do not become like an evil offender.

Phrases that morally kill a person for humiliation

I want to warn you right away that they should be used with great caution. The whole point is that you are endowed with the ability to program a person to Negative consequences. His payment for the offense caused to you will be an unfortunate event that will occur in close connection with the verbal “prophecy”.
Not entirely clear?
Now you will understand everything.

Examples of phrases that kill morally and fatally program the offender for “eternal memory”:

5). I won't answer you anything. But then you will understand that you have acquired all the misfortunes from that day.
6). The line to see the oncologist is very long, and you will end up at the end. (Say these words only in case of severe humiliation.)
7). You have to pay for everything in this life. Don’t forget this day, so that later you don’t think about why God punished you.
8). From this moment on, misfortunes will begin in your life. I'm not scaring, but I know about it.

With a little imagination, you can add a lot to the proposed list.
Just don’t go too far and don’t program a good person into bad fatalism.
It is quite possible that you have been humiliated by a rather suspicious and weak person who will begin to fade away after everything that has been said.