Does a modern man need a family? Sacred marriage or why do we need a family? Does a man need a family?

Continuing the conversation about marriage.

Let's think about this question: Why is it necessary? to the modern man wife? We won't talk about slobbering mama's boys, drunks, etc.

Here's what we'll talk about:

He is 28 or older, has a good education, his own home, a prestigious, well-paid job, possibly his own business. You will say - “There are no such people!” But there are some...

So what can a modern woman offer such a man?

1. Guardian of the hearth. And what exactly will she “protect”? Maintain cleanliness and order in the house? So for this you don’t need a wife at all. If you are too lazy yourself, then there are a lot of companies like “Wife for an Hour”, they will come and clean it up and put things in order. It’s not expensive at all, but if you negotiate bypassing the office, it’s even cheaper. And most importantly, much cheaper, keeper of the hearth.

2. Sex. After the sexual revolution of the 20th century, waking up in the morning with a girl you didn’t know just yesterday is as easy as shelling pears. And finding such a girl is also not a problem - nightclubs, dating sites, etc. and so on. Well, the prostitution business has not gone away either - on the contrary, it has grown and offers its clients more and more new services - including support and contracts on an ongoing basis.

3. It's delicious to eat. Firstly, many modern women They prepare it in such a way that it is better to read a prayer before eating. Secondly, and this is not a problem in modern world! Reach out to the phone and they will bring you whatever you want - from pizza to soup. And it will be even warmer. Again, there are a proliferation of cafes with tasty and inexpensive food, and all sorts of supermarkets are littered with ready-made salads and cutlets.

4. Procreation. If we take into account the number of divorces in our country, then somehow this point can be questioned. The likelihood that the children will stay with their father is negligible. But there is one more point, surrogacy + nanny. It sounds scary, of course, but it is becoming more and more important in our lives. And the cost of this service is decreasing year by year, and there are more and more women wanting to earn extra money in this way.

5. Love is a carrot. Do you need to get married for this?

And here are the remarks of various men on this topic:

Imagine, my friends and I have very good finances and we are not married, we are over 30 and there are 10 to 15 of us. Can you tell me why? But because while you’re earning a living and showing off, you’ll learn so much that you won’t want to drag a single fool into the registry office. A man is not an ATM, he needs to be fed and respected, and not fooled and deceived. However, the venality of women allows us to turn around without straining, we stand in line to sit in the Bentley.

I'm looking for a wife-friend, but what do I see around? Under 30 years old is a different generation, incomprehensible and unpleasant, and women of the same age are either embittered divorcees, or a vamp in search of a “last chance,” or grown-up “mothers.” I haven't found anyone yet.

Article about me. I'm 42 higher education, university teacher + own small business. Bad habits and there are no chronic diseases. Fitness - every day. Divorced 2 weeks ago. Eldest daughter(17 years old) wanted to stay with me, the youngest (9 years old) was left by the court to her mother. Now we share an apartment. I don’t need to cook or clean (I’m used to this from the army). I satisfy the need to take care of someone at the expense of my daughters. Now I'm immersed in work. I'm not going to get married. How can I imagine that for “access to the body” I will again have to endlessly listen to complaints and reproaches - it’s better without a wife. You can always find a girl who will do this for relatively little money.

I had the experience of communicating with a beautiful lady. But still, I need a partner in my life, not a “director”. There are already enough directors above me.

The reason is that women want to control and do not leave their own personal space, and also because of the immense jealousy of women. They interfere with work and communication with friends, and for men this is very important.

Why should a man always be obliged? Alas, the life of men and its priorities evolve, and loneliness, like freedom, is deposited in their subconscious: “I’ll live for myself, and not for someone else.”

Women's responses to these comments. So nothing special "whiners", "losers", and the like

And what do you think?

And more on the topic on behalf of a woman

Sometimes strange questions come into my head. For example, is a family needed? to modern man. Is the family a relic of the past? What does it give? Support? It’s good if so, but in most cases you have to deal with the opposite situation. Then why?

I ask this question to the first person I meet and get the answer: “There should be a wife, because there should be one. Her job is to sit at home and raise children”... It’s very reminiscent of the answer of another friend of mine about the dog. When I was indignant at why he bought a dog, a living (if anyone doesn’t know) creature, if he doesn’t pay any attention to it at all, doesn’t play, doesn’t walk and sees it for five minutes in the morning and evening, he calmly replied: “That’s why she’s a dog.” "My job is to feed her so that she doesn't die. Her job is to love me for that."

I don’t want to believe that men think the same about their wives, and, nevertheless, they behave very similarly to them. I feed her, she loves me. What else? And indeed. What do women who get married, give birth to children and then sit at home count on? At least, unlike dogs, they had a choice. But that's another story - let's talk about why husbands need this?

I asked the same question to different men. This question sounded like this: “Does a modern man need a family and, if so, why?”

This is what they told me.

Of course not. Why do I need a family? I can eat in a restaurant, do laundry at the laundromat, sleep with whoever I want, whenever I want. Family is just extra problems, but I already have enough problems.

I nodded. This is the most common answer. At least that's what 90 percent of women hear as soon as they start hinting at making the relationship official. This is an "excuse".

I moved on to the next survey victim.

Need not. It is simply impossible to implement it in the form in which you want, which means it makes no sense.

That is?

A perfect man needs an equally perfect woman. And the perfect woman is himself, only with a clitoris.

I thought about it. - So, perfect women don’t exist?

No.

Does this mean family is impossible?

Yes.

Well. Also an opinion. Next!

A strange question - why is it needed?

Well how...

Are you getting married?

No, what are you talking about!

Children are needed, but family is not needed. Or later...

When later?

Sometime later...

But family is good!

Only in pictures. In reality, I work constantly, I have no time for my wife, or for children, or for anything. And why then have a family if I can’t... use it?

Logical... At least he thinks about others...

And then I thought - maybe I’m asking the wrong question to the wrong men. Their answers play into my hands, but make my material appear biased...

And I went to the right men.

Of course I need it, he answered me. the right man, and I sighed with relief.

What for?

To admire your wife all your life.

I sank. This is not an answer. This is all very romantic and wonderful, but not viable. You can admire your wife at first and then... sometimes. Well, or after 50 years of marriage, at least this is a well-deserved reason to admire her patience. But that doesn't sound like a justification for marriage.

I glanced at the contact list on icq and decided to ask this question to a man who was married, was happily married and, therefore, could destroy my entire theory with one blow. Which, in principle, is what happened.

Hello. Can you help me?

Money?

ABOUT! No.

(Oh, these happy married people to me!)

I’m writing an article about family here. Answer me a couple of questions: do you need a family and why? (weird question family man)

At 30, of course, you don’t need a family, but when you’re 60, who’s going to carry the cash?

I didn't think about this!

Family is an investment in old age.

What is the likelihood that your children will take care of you? - I asked venomously.

If they don’t exist, then the probability will be zero. I'll try to teach them. I just look at my parents and understand that this is important.

I tried to say a couple more barbs that would destroy his mercantile theory, but then he dealt that fatal blow...

And in general I like it.

What do you like? - I pretended that I didn’t understand what he was talking about.

Me, wife, child. Picnic with parents. Dinner upon arrival home.

My mood was deteriorating every second. It turns out that in nature there are men who like family (why haven’t I met them before?).

But let's get back to the analysis. This means that there are men for whom family is important. Most likely, these are people who observed a completely happy picture of their parents’ marriage and are now repeating it. They know it's the right thing and they do the right thing. Does this mean that only children from equally normal families can have the ability to have a normal family? Are children from single-parent or unhappy families completely uninterested in family? But, if this is so, then the percentage of family people will constantly melt, as the number of children raised in full family. On the other hand, they say there is nothing stronger than the families of former orphanages, so what is it?

Based on the results of surveys, heart-to-heart conversations and my life experience, it turned out that the family had outlived its usefulness and was no longer needed. But there were those who remained faithful to the old traditions and, therefore, they have some kind of truth of their own. But which one?

You see, if you are not married, you are a p(*censored*)s in every sense.

I choked on cigarette smoke. Finally I heard the truth.

All business. All! They marry healthy women who can give birth to healthy children, and they themselves (*censored*) are young fools in rented apartments.

All! That is, not the absolute majority, but everyone.

I turned green.

Well, maybe, except...

Except who?

Except for those who don't have money for rented apartments... And everyone understands this. And colleagues, and wives, and these... girls themselves...

I finished smoking and tried to come to my senses. So now I knew the most terrible secret about big business, but this still did not answer why they needed a family. Moreover, it did not give an answer.

The myth that family is an indicator of stability is as outdated as the myth that masturbation makes hair grow on the palms of your hands. It has long been clear to everyone that politicians who have lived with one wife for 40 years are a lie. The ideal husband has tried all the underage models, and the ideal wife has tried all possible antidepressants. They are doomed to each other, shackled by one chain, spouses are people harnessed to one team. A pathetic parody of a happy marriage. Male chauvinism and female alcoholism. Role models for voters, neighbors and their own children.

Why do they still adhere to this stupid tradition? Why don't they admit: "Yes, I'm divorced. Yes, I'm single. Yes, I'm homosexual! (and so is my wife)."

Why?

How everyone loved Bill Clinton after they found out that he was cuckolding his boring wife by staining Monica Lewinsky's blue dress! He immediately became closer to the people! Why do people draw parallels between a faithful husband and a faithful business partner? It's not related in any way.

Perhaps it's all about the children! They want to be fruitful and multiply, and for this they need a family.

“I don’t need a family at all in order to be fruitful and multiply,” another friend broke my theory. - Yes, a woman should be healthy, good, I will take part in upbringing... but what does marriage have to do with it?

Logical. Marriage has nothing to do with it. Anyway, they have all long ago turned into “visiting dads” and do not educate from morning to night.

What to do? My mother always taught me to put myself in another person's shoes. I’ll try to put myself in my wife’s shoes and be indignant on her behalf and say a few words in defense of the family. Well, firstly, about the glass of water that she will give if something happens and, secondly, what... what... how is this? A! About the fact that it is very important for a man to know that someone is waiting for him at home. That this someone is glad to see him back. That he is the dearest. That you can tell him everything. That you can be real with him. That he knows everything about you. What will not betray. He won't quit. Everything will be forgiven. It is very important. It's the most important. And it is true. True - if that's the case. And I sincerely envy such families and am glad if they exist. Now, perhaps, I will deprive my wife of the right to speak, otherwise she will destroy my harmonious theory about the death of marriage. Wife, know your place!

Summarizing all of the above, I came to the conclusion that... No. I came to two conclusions at once. The first conclusion is this: a modern man does not need a family. And the second conclusion is exactly the opposite: after all, if they start families, it means someone needs it...

I found an article on one forum. Since I don’t have the opportunity to answer there, I’ll write down the judgment for myself, and then read it someday.
However, probably not even once, because family life just started. I will periodically reread and rethink. Maybe it will help one day...

Sometimes strange questions come into my head. For example, does a modern person need a family? Is the family a relic of the past? What does it give? Support? It’s good if so, but in most cases you have to deal with the opposite situation. Then why?
I ask this question to the first person I meet and get the answer: “There should be a wife, because there should be one. Her job is to sit at home and raise children”... It’s very reminiscent of the answer of another friend of mine about the dog. When I was indignant at why he bought a dog, a living (if anyone doesn’t know) creature, if he doesn’t pay any attention to it at all, doesn’t play, doesn’t walk and sees it for five minutes in the morning and evening, he calmly replied: “That’s why she’s a dog.” "My job is to feed her so that she doesn't die. Her job is to love me for that."
I don’t want to believe that men think the same about their wives, and, nevertheless, they behave very similarly to them. I feed her, she loves me. What else? And indeed. What do women who get married, give birth to children and then sit at home count on? At least, unlike dogs, they had a choice. But that's another story - let's talk about why husbands need this?
I asked the same question to different men. This question sounded like this: “Does a modern man need a family and, if so, why?”
This is what they told me.
- Of course not. Why do I need a family? I can eat in a restaurant, do laundry at the laundromat, sleep with whoever I want, whenever I want. Family is just extra problems, but I already have enough problems.
I nodded. This is the most common answer. At least that's what 90 percent of women hear as soon as they start hinting at making the relationship official. This is an "excuse".
I moved on to the next survey victim.
- Need not. It is simply impossible to implement it in the form in which you want, which means it makes no sense.
- That is?
- A perfect man needs an equally perfect woman. And the perfect woman is himself, only with a clitoris.
I thought about it. - So, perfect women don’t exist?
- No.
- So, family is impossible?
- Yes.
Well. Also an opinion. Next!
- A strange question - why is it needed?
- Well, how...
- Are you getting married?
- No, what are you talking about!
- Children are needed, but a family is not needed. Or later...
- When later?
- Sometime later...
- But family is good!
- Only in pictures. In reality, I work constantly, I have no time for my wife, or for children, or for anything. And why then have a family if I can’t... use it?

Logical... At least he thinks about others...
And then I thought - maybe I’m asking the wrong question to the wrong men. Their answers play into my hands, but make my material appear biased...
And I went to the right men.
“Of course I need it,” the right man answered me, and I sighed with relief.
- What for?
- To admire your wife all your life.

I sank. This is not an answer. This is all very romantic and wonderful, but not viable. You can admire your wife at first and then... sometimes. Well, or after 50 years of marriage, at least this is a well-deserved reason to admire her patience. But that doesn't sound like a justification for marriage.
I glanced at the contact list on icq and decided to ask this question to a man who was married, was happily married and, therefore, could destroy my entire theory with one blow. Which, in principle, is what happened.

Hello. Can you help me?
- Money?
- ABOUT! No.
(Oh, these happy married people to me!)
- I’m writing an article about family here. Answer me a couple of questions: do you need a family and why? (strange question for a family man)
- At the age of 30, of course, you don’t need a family, but when you are 60, who will carry the money?
- I didn’t think about that!
- Family is an investment in old age.
- What is the likelihood that children will take care of you? - I asked venomously.
- If they don’t exist, then the probability will be zero. I'll try to teach them. I just look at my parents and understand that this is important.
I tried to say a couple more barbs that would destroy his mercantile theory, but then he dealt that fatal blow...
- And in general I like it.
- What do you like? - I pretended that I didn’t understand what he was talking about.
- Me, wife, child. Picnic with parents. Dinner upon arrival home.
My mood was deteriorating every second. It turns out that in nature there are men who like family (why haven’t I met them before?).
But let's get back to the analysis. This means that there are men for whom family is important. Most likely, these are people who observed a completely happy picture of their parents’ marriage and are now repeating it. They know it's the right thing and they do the right thing. Does this mean that only children from equally normal families can have the ability to have a normal family? Are children from single-parent or unhappy families completely uninterested in family? But, if this is so, then the percentage of family people will constantly melt, as the number of children raised in a complete family is melting. On the other hand, they say there is nothing stronger than the families of former orphanages, so what is it?
Based on the results of surveys, heart-to-heart conversations and my life experience, it turned out that the family had outlived its usefulness and was no longer needed. But there were those who remained faithful to the old traditions and, therefore, they have some kind of truth of their own. But which one?
- You see, if you are not married, you are a p(*censored*)s in every sense.
I choked on cigarette smoke. Finally I heard the truth.
- The whole business. All! They marry healthy women who can give birth to healthy children, and they themselves (*censored*) are young fools in rented apartments.
- All? - I asked with a trembling voice.
- All! That is, not the absolute majority, but everyone.
I turned green.
- Well, maybe, except...
- Except who?
- Except for those who don’t have money for rented apartments... And everyone understands this. And colleagues, and wives, and these... girls themselves...
I finished smoking and tried to come to my senses. So, now I knew the worst secret about big business, but it still didn’t answer why they needed a family. Moreover, it did not give an answer.
The myth that family is an indicator of stability is as outdated as the myth that masturbation makes hair grow on the palms of your hands. It has long been clear to everyone that politicians who have lived with one wife for 40 years are a lie. The ideal husband has tried all the underage models, and the ideal wife has tried all possible antidepressants. They are doomed to each other, shackled by one chain, spouses are people harnessed to one team. A pathetic parody of a happy marriage. Male chauvinism and female alcoholism. Role models for voters, neighbors and their own children.
Why do they still adhere to this stupid tradition? Why don't they admit: "Yes, I'm divorced. Yes, I'm single. Yes, I'm homosexual! (and so is my wife)."
Why?
How everyone loved Bill Clinton after they found out that he was cuckolding his boring wife by staining Monica Lewinsky's blue dress! He immediately became closer to the people! Why do people draw parallels between a faithful husband and a faithful business partner? It's not related in any way.
Perhaps it's all about the children! They want to be fruitful and multiply, and for this they need a family.
“I don’t need a family at all in order to be fruitful and multiply,” another friend broke my theory. - Yes, a woman should be healthy, good, I will take part in upbringing... but what does marriage have to do with it?

Logical. Marriage has nothing to do with it. Anyway, they have all long ago turned into “visiting dads” and do not educate from morning to night.
What to do? My mother always taught me to put myself in another person's shoes. I’ll try to put myself in my wife’s shoes and be indignant on her behalf and say a few words in defense of the family. Well, firstly, about the glass of water that she will give if something happens and, secondly, what... what... how is this? A! About the fact that it is very important for a man to know that someone is waiting for him at home. That this someone is glad to see him back. That he is the dearest. That you can tell him everything. That you can be real with him. That he knows everything about you. What will not betray. He won't quit. Everything will be forgiven. It is very important. It's the most important. And it is true. True - if that's the case. And I sincerely envy such families and am glad if they exist. Now, perhaps, I will deprive my wife of the right to speak, otherwise she will destroy my harmonious theory about the death of marriage. Wife, know your place!
Summarizing all of the above, I came to the conclusion that... No. I came to two conclusions at once. The first conclusion is this: a modern man does not need a family. And the second conclusion is exactly the opposite: after all, if they start families, it means someone needs it...
(c) Polina Voloshina

10795

In the last article I told you whether you should get married or not. Today you will find out why a man needs a woman and a family. And you can make the right decision whether to start it or not.

When does a man need a woman? What is a woman to a man? Why does a man need a woman and a family? Any sane man will ask this question sooner or later.

Proximity. Inspiration. Support. Care. Only from your dearest one can you get all this.

What else does a woman give to a man? Watch my video tutorials and find out how to build a harmonious and lasting relationship with a girl. In the meantime, I’ll tell you why and why a man needs a woman.

Why and why a man needs a woman and a family:

From a practical point of view.

You're probably thinking, this is what a woman can really offer me? Why does a man need a wife? It's just extra hemorrhoids. You look for benefits, real meaning, think logically.

You're used to dealing with everything alone. And then someone will walk around your den and bother you.

I have identified three main aspects that most men rely on when looking for practical benefits from marriage.

Why does a man need a woman:

• Sex. Great, she's always nearby. There is no need to strain yourself, meet new young ladies and seduce anyone. To persuade - too. You take it and that's it. I got tired and went to the left.

But you can have sex even if you are free, right? How many services already exist, also in beautiful packaging. There are so many free women, my eyes run wide. Why then a permanent girlfriend?

• House. Cleanliness, always a stocked refrigerator and ironed shirts, right? Mom used to do it, but now who? Now I need a wife. There must be real benefit from it.

But you can hire a housekeeper. It's not that expensive. Today there are also plenty of similar services. Clean, on time and on sale. Why a wife?

• Children. It’s more complicated here, you need a woman to give birth and raise them. But in practice, even this can be done without a permanent partner. There are surrogate mothers, adoption and nannies. It sounds crazy, but you wanted to think logically.

It turns out that if you approach marriage from the point of view of benefits, a woman is not needed at all. Or rather, his constant woman.

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Why endure these hysterics, wasting your salary, eternal dripping on the brain and PMS? When can you safely manage on your own?

But this approach doesn't work. I'll explain why.

Why does a man need a family?

It doesn’t work because you can’t approach each other from the position of “you to me, I to you.” Marriage is not a transaction. And those who manipulate the word “should” in the family will not be able to build happy relationships.

It’s impossible for you to cook potatoes for me and I’ll fix your doors. Or you give me a child, and I will give you part of my salary for his toys.

Why does a man need a family? Family is your rear, your support and your meaning.

Family is a place where you are loved, appreciated and respected. Where you are is always the best and most beloved in the world.

Here you are not surrounded by enemies or competitors, as in the outside world. Here only the closest people are nearby.

And it is the woman, your wife, who will be next to you in any situation. You can rely on her, trust her and count on her participation.

Without women, we will cease to feel like men.

They are the ones who give us a reason to prove ourselves. It is women who motivate us to achieve and strive. For their sake, we strive for the best.

They make us want to demonstrate male strength and perform feats. So that women respect us. Everything was written for women greatest poems, because women are our muses, they inspire us.

And, if we discard all the accompanying pleasant bonuses that the wife will perform, she is needed only in one capacity. To be there, support you in trouble and share joy together. To live your life with you.

And do you know what family is?

When I had nothing in my life, when I went bankrupt, I realized one thing. That no one calls me. I stopped being needed by everyone who used to communicate with me.

Only my family remained nearby. And, believe my experience, no one cares about you. Everyone except them.

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