What to do when meeting a girl. How to properly meet a girl? Psychologist's advice

When I talk about how to meet girls, most often they expect me to say some correct phrases that will make her laugh, warm up to you, and melt. But the meaning of the words we pronounce means practically nothing. This is approximately 7-11% of what information we perceive from another person. Everything else lies only in the language of our body (what we show in relation to ourselves, in relation to this person) and on the characteristics of our voice. Both the body and the characteristics of the voice are something that is very difficult to fake. This is precisely why, from the first glance at another person, we immediately form a very quick impression.

How does our inner state affect a girl?

You need to have a state in which the girl is very comfortable to be. How to get this condition? Firstly, this condition is associated with whether a man is afraid of women. Including beautiful women. A lot depends on this, because if a man feels fear, then a woman will feel fear. But she won't understand what's going on.

Women, in my deep conviction, are often the recipients of our states, especially at the beginning of a relationship. We, too, are recipients of their states, but this is rather over time.

Therefore, you yourself should be very calm, you yourself should be very comfortable. Your attitude towards the person with whom you are communicating should be somehow very friendly, but with different categories this goodwill.

For example, we often discuss how we should treat the opposite sex - both women and men. And guess what? For many, this is an insight that you can truly be admired by the opposite sex, not by appearance, but by the appearance, the appearance of people. Because they are somehow much cooler than you.

And when you begin to truly, in a simple, kind, human way, begin to admire people, women, they will feel it very strongly. And finding yourself in the state that you generate (the state of care, guardianship), women will feel very comfortable. Because in many ways they are very dependent, they need our support. Women cannot even be in their own states; they need our permission to be absolutely anything. And this is condescension in the good sense of the word. Not in the sense that you are worse than me, and I am stronger, but in the sense of “well, listen, you’re a girl, you need care.” And the girl may be 50 years old, but she is still a girl!

How to meet girls, what is the most important thing when meeting girls?

The main thing is to create a natural state from which any acquaintance will easily work out. Once upon a time, a long time ago, I conducted a training on this topic. And for men it was an insight that in such a state one could approach a woman and hum or say nothing at all, but she suddenly became interested in the man.

As a rule, men meet women in a very strange mixture of fear, fear that she will be rude, that everyone will look at me. In the feeling that I don’t understand women. And this is such a bizarre mixture of states that any normal woman would want to escape.

Your condition is primary! You must reach a state of desire to be a support for the opposite sex. When you have this state, then you will not have a question - how to meet girls, what should I say. You don't have to say anything. Or you can come up to the supermarket nearby, take a beet and say: “Listen, how to cook this thing?” Why? Yes, because I want to joke so kindly and improve the mood of this wonderful person, which you liked.

Please don’t look for templates, don’t look for the right phrases, good jokes, or some “openers.” Look for an opportunity to learn yourself, personally, to be inspired by women. And treat them with great trepidation. There are very few men for whom women are not problems in life, but also something else necessary, a very great source of joy, energy, the meaning of actions.

The question arises - how to look for such a state? Look for what creates this condition. There are films that are dedicated to beautiful, reverent, deep relationships. It could be films or music, it could be some kind of creativity, creativity with which you connect or your personal creation. That is, something that this state will allow you to receive.

Just remember that the most important thing in how to meet girls is what you feel next to a person, what you convey to him, and not what you say, since words have no special meaning. And then you'll figure it out. Good luck!

Talk, control the flow of the conversation, be able to insert the right phrases and compliments into the conversation at the right time.

The trick is to learn a few techniques and then practice them until they shine.

Then I will meet girls completely automatically.

Some rules for meeting girls need to be considered in more detail.

Principle 1: Look into the eyes

Visual contact before meeting a girl is very important. If you look into a girl's eyes, don't look away first.

When she looks at you a second time, give her your dazzling smile. Just don't delay flirting.

After making visual contact with the girl you like, walk up to her while she's not looking at you and start getting to know each other.

Keep the conversation measured. Don't forget to look your interlocutor in the eyes.

To prevent your eyes from running around in excitement, it is advised to look at the bridge of your nose, where the line of the eyes runs, or at one eye.

Principle 2. Free movements

In the first minutes, it is important not to confuse her with excessive gestures, but better - “hands in your trousers” (it is advisable to keep your hands in your back pockets).

And don't squeeze your shoulders, chest forward.

Moreover, it is you who make the appointment, but in a delicate manner: “We can meet on Friday at 18:00 and have a pleasant conversation in a cafe in a cozy atmosphere over a cup of coffee. If you want".

The phrase “If you want” is mandatory, because it has a magical power that acts on the subconscious (from the field of neurolinguistic programming).

When making key sentences, use this phrase as a final one, but do not overuse it. There must be a measure for everything.

Principle 5. Attract the attention of other women

To attract the attention of a certain person to your person, there is one effective method. It consists in the following.

Let's say you found new job and from the very first days you begin to get to know the team.

You take a closer look at the situation, approach a co-worker or employee with questions that interest you, that is, you show interest in the society around you.

Of course, when communicating with girls live, you will be selective. And it is right.

But as for the rules of meeting girls, it’s better to first come up and talk to some nondescript and “gray mouse” who, in your opinion, has taken a liking to you, and at the same time not deprive anyone of your bright smile.

The main thing is that it looks natural and relaxed.

Today with one, tomorrow with two - don’t get hung up on communicating with certain girls.

While in a cafe on your lunch break, for example, you can sit down at a table with ladies who are not from your office at all.

Give yourself more freedom of choice. After all, sooner or later you will still get to know your employees.

Principle 6: Improvise

Imagine this: in the morning, you go to work with Vika (an employee), having met by chance when leaving the subway, and have a nice conversation.

Natasha, whom you met yesterday at lunch in a cafe, overtakes you and nods at you smilingly.

And if she doesn’t notice, don’t hesitate to call out to her with any request or question.

Your job is to include Natasha in your conversation with Vika, or delicately, after leaving Vika, continue to communicate with Natasha.

And it doesn’t matter whether Natasha is inferior to Vika in terms of external indicators or not.

The main thing is to let others know that you are very interested in female society.

Of course, Vika will be at a loss, because her pride will be affected.

“How can it be, I’m not used to being treated like this by such an impudent guy.” And he’ll immediately think: “He’s an interesting person. I’m curious: does he like me or does he treat all girls so nicely?”

Vika is haunted by female curiosity. You will become an object of discussion in the women's circle.

The next time you want to chat with Vika, the conversation will be more lively, since important receptors of female nature have been touched and activated: curiosity, then interest in you.

The principle of operation of the presented option can be applied in any other situation.

Why do millions of handsome, smart and interesting young guys continue to remain lonely and do not know how to behave when meeting a girl? Everyone has their own reason and one of them is the fear of approaching a girl.

But where does it come from? How to stop worrying and pull yourself together? How to increase your self-esteem? What to say and how to behave? Millions of such questions swarm in almost everyone’s head. young man. And more than one guy would give a lot for the ability to confidently, easily and naturally with the girl he liked. Seven basic rules for communicating with the fair sex will help you gain such confidence.

Rule 1 - Maintain self-control when approaching a girl.

The approach to the girl is yours business card, the first impression she will form about you. After all, people meet you by their clothes! At this key moment, maintaining composure is critical. At the same time, it is necessary to exude confidence, calm and complete control over the situation. Another important factor is your mood. After all, there is no girl in the world who doesn’t like guys with a good sense of humor!

These rules, simple at first glance, are not given to everyone, and the excitement that a guy experiences when approaching a girl is a normal phenomenon. But you can fight this. And there are a number of effective exercises for this.

The first exercise is aimed at suppressing the nervous state and gaining a sense of calm. To do this, you need to take a deep breath and hold your breath for about one minute. After this, slowly exhale and breathe deeply. Such actions will fill your blood and brain with oxygen, improve mental performance and increase confidence in your abilities.

But what to do if the girl you like is already here, nearby and there is no time for all these exercises? In this case, your existing experience will help you, which will allow you to perform the necessary actions almost “automatically”. To gain such experience, you need practice with many approaches to girls, and not necessarily those that give you goosebumps.

It is also important to remember that anxiety is not always a bad thing! If it is not pronounced - you don’t bite your nails, don’t tear your hair out and don’t stutter, then this is even a plus! The girl feels that you are a little worried, which means you are not indifferent to her. Therefore, easily hidden excitement and confident speech are just what you need! In this case, confident speech is important! Therefore, the second exercise will be to think through and plan your approach to the girl. You need to start a conversation with a girl confidently and without stuttering. You can rehearse such actions at home in front of a mirror, a video camera, or with a friend, who will have to be persuaded to temporarily play the role of a girl.

Rule 2 - Maintain high self-esteem and self-confidence.

Adequate self-esteem and the ability to present yourself are necessary qualities when communicating with any girl. But unfortunately, not everyone knows what they are really capable of. All your victories and achievements that you have had in life will help you increase your self-esteem and gain self-confidence. You just need to remember them, think about what you do better than others, what you are proud of in life, where you have achieved success.

If you act impromptu, you won’t remember everything at once. Therefore, you need to sit in a chair, relax and go over all your achievements and successes in your memory. Remember those moments in life when you felt euphoria and a surge of strength. It could be anything! From winning sports competitions to a banal massacre, where you punched the offender in the mouth or simply fucked the neighbor girl. Such Nice memories an hour and a half before meeting will definitely bear fruit. You will be positive, feel your importance and strength!

Rule 3 - Maintain certain topics of conversation when meeting people.

What to talk about with a girl at the beginning of dating? In fact, there is no specific or universal topic of conversation when meeting a girl. It all starts with a conversation about banal things, with a greeting, a compliment, and ideally with a joke. If you have time, you need to think about what you can talk about with the girl you like.

At the beginning of the conversation, it is important to think through in advance the answers to all the girl’s suspicious questions, such as “why did you come?”, “Who are you?”, etc. You need to answer calmly and kindly, understanding that the girl has every right to worry.

The first and most important mistake that beginners make at the beginning of dating is to start bombarding the girl with questions. Some are even firmly convinced that this is necessary in order to adapt to the girl and get to know her. Not really! This is not recommended. On the contrary, it is better to talk about yourself and open up to the girl in order to gain her trust.

Examples of the first phrases when approaching a girl could be: “I was walking past and noticed how charming you are!”, “I actually work... there, and what are you doing?” etc. At the same time, it is not recommended to start acquaintance with the hackneyed word “hello,” even if fairly young people are meeting.

Already after the first phrases at the beginning of acquaintance, you can switch to “you”, especially if the girl is clearly younger than you. If the acquaintance began with “you,” then we switch to “you” somewhere in the middle of the conversation. At the same time, regardless of whether communication takes place in “you” or “you”, you should address the girl politely and gallantly. The only exception to this rule can be your brutal and cheerful disposition. These are the qualities that almost any girl really likes. In this case, you don’t have to worry about how to approach her at all, but just go and get acquainted.

Use the correct phrases and expressions when meeting people.

When communicating with a girl, it is important not to be in a blizzard, but to use the right phrases and expressions. Many people mistakenly think that phrases like “does your mother need a son-in-law?” or “I’m an alien from Alpha Centauri, I want to know how you’re doing here” and the like, this is cool and original. In fact - nonsense and complete crap! Perhaps, once upon a time, in the days of Petrosyan and crimson jackets, this would have allowed you to stand out from the rest. But not in our time. Now it doesn’t work and, on the contrary, it will only scare the girl you like away from you. Feel free to throw all this nonsense into the firebox!

So what should you say when communicating? What phrases to use? And the answer is simple - there are no specific universal phrases! The whole secret is in ordinary, polite, gallant and adequate communication. It is important to make a positive impression on the girl! The impression of an ordinary guy, successful in life, who unexpectedly decided for himself with a girl. If you achieve this, it will replace all the magic phrases that have ever been advised to you. With adequate, polite communication, such ordinary phrases as “good afternoon”, “good evening” or as a last resort“hello” - if the girl is simple and open in communication. This is the beginning. Well, then just develop communication.

Rule 4 - Pay attention to your appearance.

How to bring your appearance in order and not think that you look bad? Just change clothes. And there are a lot of styles. First of all, it is worth noting the classic style - it is made by a jacket, under which you can wear jeans, a shirt and not necessarily a tie. Although, many people love and wear a tie - but this is not an acquired taste. Fashionable casual clothes may cost more than classic clothes, but look cheaper. But those who understand will appreciate it anyway.

When choosing clothes, just choose expensive and branded items - they will always fit you stylishly and beautifully. The main thing is that the clothes fit true to size, and not 10 sizes too big. Jocks and guys with a athletic figure are recommended to wear clothes that flatter their figure. If it’s warm enough outside, you can wear a T-shirt. In winter, turtlenecks are suitable for this.

The next element of appearance is a well-groomed face. There should be no pimples or blackheads! You need to get rid of them in any way.

Hairstyle - another one essential element appearance. And here you really feel the difference - you got a haircut for 50 rubles or for 3000. The quality of the haircut immediately catches your eye, everyone sees it and girls pay a lot of attention to it!

Of course, you can forget about all this, cut your hair for your halo, put on sneakers with ripped jeans and go ahead! Only then you don’t need to blame anyone for your bad mood due to a bunch of refusals! In addition, a beautiful, stylish appearance will help you raise your self-esteem and be more confident in yourself. After all, you will no longer worry about “what do I look like?” And this is already a good basis for success.

Rule 5 - Assess your chances correctly.

How do you know if you can meet a girl or not? The easiest way to find out is to come and try it. If everything is fine and you have a nice conversation, then you succeeded. And if a wall of misunderstanding immediately arises, then it’s not worth trying.

To correctly assess the situation, it is often enough just to give the girl a compliment. If the girl reacts well, then the path to dating is open. If the reaction is negative, then it’s better not to continue. You can just come up with a poll. But in practice, girls react even worse to such “indirect approaches”.

The option of simply playing with your eyes cannot be ruled out. But you need to be able to do it, practice – and then everything will work out. The main thing is to approach dating correctly - to put yourself in order, do something with your self-esteem, increase self-confidence, and maintain a positive attitude.

Rule 6 - Learn to notice signs that a girl is interested in you.

A girl's interest in you is already a success in dating, which you just need to develop! What are these signs? Among the standard ones are a slight smile, laughter, winking, playing with hair, shoe socks pointed at you, light preening, adjusting makeup, clothes, hair, jewelry, open wrists and others. Sometimes the girl begins to get a little nervous and fuss, while looking in your direction.

If there are two girls, it means laughter and insinuating glances at you. Moreover, such laughter is mistakenly perceived by many as mockery, which is a mistake. If girls laugh when communicating, this is definitely good! This means that you have interested them.

To learn to notice all these signs, you also need practice. You can get it in just a couple of months. To do this, just walk in the subway, on the street and in other places and look at the girls and their reaction. If necessary, write down the main points for yourself.

Vlad Pozier | Relationship Psychologist

Vlad Pozier is the author of unique trainings aimed at self-knowledge and self-improvement, dating and seduction. His lessons are aimed at positive changes in a person’s life, and psychological techniques are aimed at improving the health of the body and working through fears and complexes for the development of harmonious relationships with the opposite sex. A graduate of the Institute of Group and Family Psychotherapy, Vlad Pozier will teach you to avoid mistakes in communicating with the opposite sex and help you create strong relationships.

Many men remain single because of fear of the opposite sex and ignorance of how to meet a girl, what to say to her during the first meeting, how to interest her and start a conversation. In fact, there is nothing complicated here - following simple recommendations allows you to find your soul mate and improve your personal life.

If you understand psychology, you can find an approach to anyone, even the most difficult person. But we do not advise you to be too persistent and waste time on a girl who clearly does not show any interest in you. You will only waste your energy and most likely achieve nothing. In this case, just politely stop communicating with her, saying that you are not suitable for each other.

How to meet a girl on the street?

For many guys, meeting a girl for the first time is a real problem. They don't know where to start a conversation, and their biggest fear is being rejected. After several unsuccessful attempts, a young man or an already mature man can stop trying such dating forever. All this is due to lack of experience and necessary knowledge.

The main sign of the likely success of an acquaintance is a direct “eye to eye” look and at the same time a friendly facial expression. This indicates the girl’s interest and the possibility of starting communication. Many guys miss such signals, get lost, look down and pass by. As a result, they miss their chance, and subsequently reproach themselves for a long time for their lack of confidence.

Contrary to stereotypes, meeting people on the street is not difficult. Moreover, this method of finding a soul mate is promising, thanks to the large selection of representatives of the fair sex. The main thing is to act assertively, confidently and from the first minutes interest your new companion. But how to properly meet a girl in order to arouse her sympathy? Let's talk about this in more detail.

What should you look like to meet a girl?

A neat appearance is a key component of future dating success. Give preference classic style– ironed shirt and trousers, as well as clean shoes. If you go for a walk in tracksuit and met the girl of your dreams, don’t miss the chance. It is important to exude confidence and be natural in your interactions with the girl. Look up, straighten your back and smile. A positive attitude signals the other person's good intentions.

How to interest her in dialogue?

Remember that girls are ordinary people who live together with men on planet Earth and are not aliens from other planets. Of course, their interests and goals may differ from men’s, but this is not an obstacle to communication, and in the future to closer relationships. Girls like it when people pay attention to them and give them compliments. They value a sense of humor, which must be used in the dating process.

If you like a girl, smile and say hello. As noted above, a smile attracts a person and disarms a representative of the fair sex. The main thing is that the smile is friendly, slightly embarrassed and always sincere. It's a simple dating tool, but it works.

What to say in the first dialogue?

The most difficult thing for guys is to find the first words that would help them start full-fledged communication and start a dialogue. The girl’s perception of the guy, as well as the success of the acquaintance in general, largely depends on the first phrase. At the same time, the topic has no knowledge. At this stage, it is important to attract attention and start communication.

Consider a few rules:

1. The first phrase should not be cumbersome - 1-5 words are enough. The simplest and most effective options are to say “Hello” or “Let’s get acquainted”;
2. You can’t ask a question, because the girl can ignore it and move on;
3. Remember that a compliment is the key to a girl's heart. But it is important that it is light and natural. Show that you have highlighted something special in your interlocutor, her “zest”. The main thing here is not to resort to cliches and banalities;
4. Focus on the situation. The spoken phrase must correspond to the surrounding situation. For example, if an acquaintance occurs while trying to cross the road, you can say “Careful, there’s a car on the left”;
5. The treatment should be positive and friendly, because initial stage You need to win someone over and inspire trust.

What to talk to her about?

For many guys, the question of how to properly meet a girl is a real dilemma. And if you still succeed in saying “Hello” or “Let’s get acquainted,” then you cannot consolidate the acquaintance and start a full-fledged dialogue. And really, what to talk about with a girl if you don’t know her interests, life principles and goals?

A simple and at the same time effective principle works here. During the communication process, focus on the interlocutor, be interested in him and ask questions. Many guys make the mistake of starting to talk about their benefits. In the eyes of a girl, such suitors look like braggarts who are not worthy of attention.

Find out what interests your interlocutor in life, what kind of music she likes, where she studies. Listen carefully and remember the answers, ask related and leading questions to get to know the girl even better.

Here are some simple questions and suggestions to start a dialogue:

1. "How old are you"?
2. "What is your name?". Immediately after the question, you can introduce yourself.
3. “I’m taking my time to get to know you better.”
4. “Your eyes are unusual, I’ve never seen anything like them before.”
5. "You have a kind face."

During the first conversation, try to describe the girl and confirm her features. Mention her appearance, clothes, and facial beauty in the conversation. You can start with a joke like “Can you talk?”, “What a big bag you have.” It’s obvious that you love to carry heavy things.”

What to do if she doesn't like you?

Guys often get confused when a girl starts a dialogue but doesn’t show much attention to them. Don’t despair – you can still interest your interlocutor. It is important to make her smile, joke, and make her relax. You can tell an interesting and funny story from your life. As a last resort, interest the girl social status. It doesn't have to be financial status. If you participate in competitions or do charity work, subtly mention it.

If your efforts do not produce results, and the girl talks “to get rid of it,” end the conversation, citing a lack of time or an urgent matter. At the same time, take a phone number so you can improve your first impression of yourself. Perhaps today the girl is in a bad mood, but tomorrow or the day after tomorrow the acquaintance over a cup of coffee will be more successful.

In numerous books and the Internet there are thousands of recommendations on how to learn to meet girls, what to do to attract attention, what things to wear, and what to talk about. Below we highlight proven advice from psychologists that help you find your other half.

Before meeting a girl, let yourself be examined. There is no need to jump out from behind and scare a person in this way. It is important to attract attention, allow a small assessment and draw conclusions. A short glance and a smile is enough for this.

If the girl responded to the smile and also smiled, began to straighten her hair or fuss, you can start getting acquainted, the result of which should be an appointment or a phone number.

Start communication with a light and original compliment. You can praise the hairstyle, evaluate right choice handbags and shoes. Don't stoop to platitudes like “You have nice breasts.” Believe me, confident girls know this themselves.

While communicating, observe your surroundings and comment on the situation. It is important that the conversation be natural. If you notice a poster for a movie you've already seen, share your impressions and ask if your interlocutor has seen it. If not, this is a great reason to invite a girl to the movies.

Unusual and unconventional phrases are good for starting communication, for example, “Who do you think cheats more often - men or women?”, “This is the first time I’m buying something for myself and I want to ask for advice.”

Consider a few more important points:

1. Don't drag out the conversation. Even if everything goes well, tell your interlocutor that you need to run and take the phone number.
2. Meet people everywhere. This could be a shopping center, street, transport. It doesn’t matter whether the girl is walking or resting on a bench.
3. Be bold and don't be afraid to start a conversation. It’s better to do something and “lose” than to regret an unused opportunity for the rest of your life. Even if you fail, you gain experience.
4. During the communication process, show confidence and do not hesitate. It is important to be persistent, because the girl may not immediately give her phone number. If the interlocutor says, “I don’t meet people on the street,” answer her in the subject line, “By the way, neither do I, but then let’s go to a restaurant and meet each other there.”
5. Imagine that you are playing in a theater, and your task is to interest a girl in yourself, to show best sides. It's even interesting.
6. Be yourself. In the process of communication, you should be natural, but at the same time improve your skills. It is important that the girl falls in love with you, and not with a fictitious character who does not exist.

Finding Motivation

In the dating process, the guy’s psychological attitude and his willingness to make contact with a representative of the opposite sex are important. If you don’t want to start communicating, you won’t be able to overcome your fear. It is important that there is a sincere desire to get to know a person, make acquaintances and start a dialogue.

Learn to motivate and “charge” yourself before communicating with a stranger. If you go “hunting”, listen to your favorite song, set yourself up for a positive result and believe in success. Imagine that the goal has already been achieved - you saw the girl of your dreams, met her and now you are sitting in a cafe at the same table. It is important that an intention is formed in your head, which invariably leads to success.

Active Listener Tactics

If you don’t know how to meet a girl and what to talk to her about, use a proven and effective tactic - listen to the interlocutor. Ask her questions that she will be happy to answer. The main thing here is not to go into a “banal” interview, for which it is worth accompanying some of the interlocutor’s answers with small comments. Step by step you get to know the person, and he feels trust in the new interlocutor, and then it’s a matter of technique.

Discussion: 12 comments

To be honest, I don’t even understand how to meet a girl on the street. No matter how hard I tried, I always came across rudeness. Invented various ways with questionnaires, surveys and other “trick” options. Apparently, you need to work on your appearance.

People. If you don’t know how to properly meet a girl, start with the most important thing - the external image. Believe me, the first impression is the most important. We are greeted “by the wrapper”, remember. It doesn’t matter what I say to a girl at the first moment if I’m dressed stylishly and neatly. The conversation somehow starts by itself.

I don’t know about you, but for me starting a conversation is the main problem. I have read a lot of literature on how to meet a girl, but have not yet achieved serious success. Although, I still found one girlfriend, but before Serious relationships it never came to fruition.

I've never complained about my ability to pick up a girlfriend. At the same time, I have never read literature on how to properly meet a girl (except for this article). Starting a conversation and even engaging in a conversation is not a problem. At the initial stage, give a compliment and try to make contact through your eyes. It is very important.

I was looking for information about meeting girls and came across this article. What can I say - very informative. All that remains is to cope with your natural fear of approaching the opposite sex. At least contact a psychologist. My knees are shaking, my palms are sweating, there’s some kind of nonsense instead of words. Please advise what to do.

I think that the most difficult thing is to start a conversation, and then it’s a matter of technique. Personally, I start with a light compliment (even a banal one), after which I become interested in the girl herself. I always smile sincerely and look slightly confused - it works.

To my shame, I can say that all attempts to make acquaintances and start a conversation failed miserably. I manage to stop the girl, but I can’t keep her talking and interest her. But I don’t give up, because in this matter you need to train.

From my own experience, I can say that when meeting and communicating for the first time, it is important to leave on time. Here I support the author. If you see that a girl is in doubt, but at the same time shows interest, take the phone number and call about 2 days later in a cafe or just for a walk.

I slightly disagree with the author regarding the active listener tactic. It seems to me that it only works after meeting and starting a relationship. A girl is unlikely to chat about everything with a stranger. Light compliments, short phrases and the beginning of contact are important here. Only then can you use the considered scheme.

I try to meet girls only through friends. This way there is less hassle and the conversation starts faster. I’ve never tried to start a conversation somewhere on the street - it’s scary. But just for fun, you should try it. Moreover, the necessary information is already available.

effectiveness criterion for a higher dating school: this is the number of women (or men) who appeared in the lives of students and the understanding of what needs to be done in order for them to continue to appear there.