How a Japanese porn actress taught the Chinese about sex. Chinese sexual traditions "The dark side" of the Chinese

Modern researchers believe that the roots of the erotic well-being of the Celestial Empire lie in its history and culture. They are confident that the teachings of the Taoists, combined with the revelations of Buddha Shakyamuni, seasoned with the wisdom of Confucius, have led to the fact that every moment of a Chinese life is filled with the breath of the cosmos, and love is seen as the apotheosis of the unity of man and the higher forces of the universe.

Orgasm in Chinese

Unlike sanctimonious Europe with its endless bans on any manifestations of sexuality, China has always treated this issue more simply, considering intimate relationships, as part of nature and human existence. The Chinese never insisted on the monopoly of spouses in terms of erotic pleasures, and concepts such as love and sex did not necessarily have to imply marriage. That is, if you want, then for your health, but in principle no one insists.

As for the actual “technique” of intimate life, in this matter Europe, with its missionary pose, was not only lagging behind, but was generally in the deep erotic Mesozoic. Even two thousand years ago, ancient Taoist healers wrote frank and understandable books about love and sex. They recommended not only enjoying sex, but also using intimate relationships as a cure for many diseases.

It was concern for health that gave rise to the technique of sexual relations that became business card Chinese erotology. It's about separating ejaculation from orgasm. Taoist sages wrote: After ejaculation, a man feels tired, his ears are buzzing, his eyes are stuck together, and he wants to sleep. He feels thirsty, and his limbs become sluggish and stiff. And if during the ejection of semen he experiences a moment of pleasure, then long hours of fatigue follow. But if a man knows how to regulate his ejaculation and reduces the number of ejaculations to a minimum, then his body becomes stronger, his mind remains clear, and his hearing and vision improve. It may seem that a man is prohibiting himself from experiencing the acute and pleasant sensation of ejaculation, however, as a result of restraint, his attraction noticeably intensifies, as if he cannot get enough of the woman he loves. Isn't that the real pleasure?

Take care of “jing” from a young age

According to Taoist teachings, we come into this world noble and capable of compassion. All our virtues stem from reserves of internal energy, which is called “jing”, concentrated in the internal organs and gradually consumed throughout life. We partially compensate for her losses by performing various good deeds and proper nutrition. Over the years, a person produces less and less energy, but spends the same amount.

After the age of 25, all reserves of beneficial energy are exhausted, and we begin to draw it from our internal organs liver, heart, kidneys, which is why they work worse. That's why we grow old, get sick and die. Our precious “ching” is lost under stress and all sorts of troubles, and anger, anger, and envy literally pump it out.

From here, the Taoist sages draw an obvious conclusion: the more energy we save, the healthier and longer we live. And you can maintain it by avoiding anger, fear, anxiety and worry, or by experiencing positive and bright feelings from good deeds, which is very difficult.

On the other hand, the ancient sages say, our sex glands contain entire deposits of high-quality “ching”, and sexual arousal allows us to increase this energy. Men uselessly spend a lot of “jing” during ejaculation, and women use it every time they menstruate. Taoist philosophers invented a huge number of technical techniques, something like gymnastics, which allows you to constantly be in a state of erotic elation in order to produce energy, pump it into the brain, cleanse it and send it to other organs to preserve youth and good spirits. The primary task for men is to ejaculate as little as possible, and for women to get rid of menstruation long before menopause and, moreover, to make love a lot and with pleasure.

We are accustomed to thinking that the peak of sexual pleasure is necessarily associated with release, orgasm. In this case, the man ejaculates, and the woman experiences rhythmic contractions of the walls of the vagina and cervix with the release of secretions from special glands. Taoist teachers call this orgasm “external” and treat it with disdain, as second-rate, associated solely with a waste of energy.

“The highest pleasure is to bring yourself to the boiling point and then turn off the heat. And let the ardor gradually fade away.” They claim that both partners experience not a physical orgasm, with a vulgar outpouring of fluids, but a spiritual, “summit” orgasm, incomparable in beauty and intensity to the “external” one. Then an unprecedented peace descends on the partners and they seem to soar in higher spheres.

Sex for gourmets

Having discovered this amazing truth, the adherents of Taoism went further and thought out in great detail every detail of the intimate relationship between a man and a woman. This is how the Tao of Love was born. In ancient treatises you can read: If a couple follows the rules of the Tao of love, then the man will remain healthy and young, and the woman will avoid a hundred diseases. Both will be able to enjoy love until the end of their days and at the same time maintain physical strength. But if they do not know how to behave properly, then lovemaking can even harm their health. And to benefit from the methods of the Tao, the couple must first learn proper breathing— breathe long and deeply so that their bodies relax. And they need to have a sense of confidence so that their hearts can be calm.

It is also necessary to reach agreement on desires so that there are no conflicts. And when they succeed in these three essential matters, then only they will be able to use the methods of Tao. In addition, lovers need to pay attention to material factors, such as temperature (so that it is neither hot nor cold where they are loved) and the state of the stomach (not too full and not too empty). And it is advisable to choose such methods of intercourse in which the woman will be completely satisfied and the man will not be exhausted. Intercourse should be easy. The ancient Chinese considered the highest act of unity between two people not so much the fusion of two bodies, but an amazing spiritual interpenetration when a man discovered within himself feminine- Yin, and a woman is masculine - Yang. It is not difficult to guess that it took a lot of time to understand and master all these techniques and wisdom. Therefore, Chinese men to this day are valued not for their youth and beauty, but for the incredible sophistication of sexual techniques and the truly marathon duration of intercourse.

There are very naive young ladies who think that kind foreigners are calling them home for tea, and there are others who have past experience. I recently talked to one such sophisticated Chinese woman. As it turned out, she is aware of most standard divorces and understands what will happen next.
The strategy is usually as banal as two and two:

Step 1. Lure the enemy into your territory. Laowai calls Chika and invites her to her home.
- Well, do you want to see how laowai lives?
- You’ve never been to Laoi’s house!
- I have something delicious from my homeland at home!
- I brought magnificent tea from country N! If you take a sip, you'll get drunk! I'm telling you!

Of course, all these phrases are pronounced with Shrek-like naivety, without hints.
In general, the first step is the most important and in most cases guarantees victory over an obviously weak opponent.

Step 2. Let him get used to himself. Eat something together, watch movies, talk about distant topics, smoothly moving on to cultural differences, which sooner or later will touch on more intimate topics. You can also discuss thickness-slenderness, beauty standards, touching hips, arms, and so on to this tune - like this is your first day in China and you suspect that the anatomy of European and Asian women is different. In addition, foreigners know that Chinese women think that it is customary to hug or even kiss when meeting. Therefore, the theme “try our culture, let me hug/dance/sing you in our own way” is used quite often.

Step 3. Then everything rolls on like a snowball. It can be with wine, it can be without, but the topics will become more frank and “naive”. But what do you care? You are already “friends”. Here, Chinese culture plays into the hands of foreigners, because in China it is much easier to call a person a friend, especially a kind foreign guest, and if he calls a Chinese woman a friend, then he shouldn’t refuse her. NLP has been launched and she is getting used to the idea that you are friends. But friends are entitled to more than strangers.
- What do they really say, laowai are better kissers?
- How do Chinese women hug? Can you hug me? No, no, just show it, just don’t think too much!
- Yeah, that is, this is how you hug, it’s understandable, but what about kissing?
(the guy needs a monument for such strong “curiosity”)
- Do you know how to French kiss? Show me! No, well, maybe on the cheek! Yeah, I see.
- Well, if it’s on the lips, but lightly, very quickly! Wow, you have talent!
“I’m a little embarrassed to ask, but I still don’t know if you know how to kiss in French, but I’m very interested, I’m burning with curiosity.”

Then everything goes according to the situation (however, as always). The Chinese woman, due to her inexperience, turns out to be not ready to resist the charms of a foreigner. If, during the process of seduction, a foreigner accidentally said nonsense, then he may make an asinine expression and say that he does not know how to correctly express a thought in Chinese. If a foreigner gropes a Chinese woman somewhere where she is not used to it, then he can again roll his eyes with the meaning “What are you doing, it’s always like this with us.” Then the whole topic goes under the banner of “cultural exchange”.

Thus, there are chicks who know one step ahead what the foreigner will do next, and the foreigners, meanwhile, have no idea that they are using patterns that all other foreigners are using.

忽悠 - that's what foreigners do to Chinese women. In general, I don’t know how stupid you have to be to know that you were invited home and think that these will be peaceful gatherings. The reason why foreigners are able to breed Chinese women is because Chinese women lack experience in making goats. It is not customary to meet people on the street in China. Yes, on the street, almost nowhere - only at some family dinners, at parties and at birthdays. Therefore, an invitation home is not perceived as something that has another meaning.

On the one hand, foreigners are spoiling Chinese women, instilling riotous club traditions in the masses of young chicks, and on the other hand, looking at some representatives of the Celestial Empire, one just wants to show Chinese women that it can be better in all respects.

In China, “the intricate melodies of numerous burps, farts and coughs are becoming a familiar and integral part of the sound picture of the world. Otherwise, it is impossible - the flows of qi energy must flow unhindered through the body.” Orientalist philologist Vera Ermilina talks about the positive and negative aspects of the Chinese mentality.

The "dark side" of the Chinese

Since many of my friends, knowing that I am in China, often begin a dialogue with the question “Well, how are the Chinese there?”, I decided to devote the first serious post on this blog to my perception of the inhabitants of the country, which this moment serves as a haven for me, but in the long term - who knows? - could become a new home for me.

Let me make a reservation right away that I am always wary of stereotypes and generalizations regarding any groups of people, especially such large ones as an ethnic group. However, after living in a country for some time, you begin, willy-nilly, to notice for yourself certain patterns, properties inherent in the vast majority of representatives of a given nationality. And, as for the Chinese, at a certain point I came to a disappointing conclusion: I don’t like them. There are several reasons for this, I’ll try to list them:

1. Household culture

It so happened that for the ordinary Chinese the expression “what is natural is not ugly” is a life credo. When you walk down the street in China, the rich variety of sounds produced harmoniously intertwines with the usual city noise. human body- the intricate melodies of numerous burps, farts and coughs become a familiar and integral part of the sound picture of the world. Otherwise, it is impossible - flows of qi energy must flow unhindered through the body and exit it at the moment when it is necessary. Many taboos familiar to Westerners do not apply here, especially in relation to children. Sitting a 7-year-old down to pee in the middle of the street is fine; breastfeeding a baby on the subway - no problem; allowing the offspring to run around the restaurant, scream and lie on the floor - why not (however, raising children is a question from a different area, perhaps I will write about this too someday). A topic for a separate story is the culture of using public restrooms: many Chinese (probably mainly those who came to the city from the provinces) do not consider it necessary to close the door when entering a stall; in those rare cases when there is a toilet in the restroom, after looking at its condition, as a rule, you still give preference to the usual “glass”.

2. Disrespect for personal space

It's no secret that there are a lot of Chinese. So many. Therefore, where a Dane or Swede gets his own house and a plot of land with a lawn, within which everything is subject to his personal taste, and he can be alone with himself, the Chinese literally sit on each other’s heads. Traditional large families, cramped apartments in which 3-4 generations live at the same time, for the older of whom collectivism is one of the main features of the worldview - all this contributes to the emergence of the habit among most Chinese of constantly being in a crowd without experiencing discomfort. Hence the extremely annoying behavior of most foreigners, for example, in the subway, when, in order to get off or on the train, people simply push each other aside; those who stand on the platform squeeze into the carriage, and without first thinking about letting people out of it, and this is not rudeness, this is the norm. If you are traveling by train or flying on an airplane, and your neighbor wants to get to know you, don’t expect to read a book; if you are nearby, it means that you are open to communication, and our usual body language - a glance directed in the other direction, a closed posture, cold and laconic answers - most likely will remain ununderstood, and, whether you like it or not, you will have to hear everything about political views, culinary preferences and vicissitudes family life interlocutor.

3. Narrow outlook

The peculiarities of Chinese education are such that learning is based on unconscious rote learning and is aimed not so much at obtaining the maximum amount of knowledge, developing a wide range of interests and creative thinking, how much to pass school and college exams (this vaguely resembles something, doesn’t it?). Therefore, as a rule, the Chinese do not shine with erudition; For most of them, the Baltic countries are somewhere between Russia and China, the population of Belgium most likely speaks Belgian, and Bolivia is an American state. In general, the picture of the world is approximately the same as that of the majority of our compatriots, but it is also complemented by a reluctance to think critically, analyze, and draw one’s own conclusions. According to my feelings, the average Chinese is an ideal machine for performing basic tasks according to standard schemes, his intellectual activity is based on a set of ideas and stereotypes learned from school (in Russia - it’s cold, a big nose is beautiful, Africans are aggressive, drink more water). Such unity of opinion among the inhabitants of a country of one billion is an absolute plus from a political point of view: the Chinese are easy to manage, their reactions are understandable and predictable. However, in terms of interpersonal and intercultural communication, it seems to me that this contributes to the preservation of a huge communication gap between “us” and “them”.

All of the above, of course, does not apply to all Chinese. Of course, among them there are highly cultured and educated people, charming personalities and excellent conversationalists. But I tried to formulate those unpleasant features that, according to my feelings, are inherent in the majority of the inhabitants of this country.

The "bright side" of the Chinese

1. Table culture

I'm not sure there is such a thing, but oh well. I am one of those people who always find the dish on my neighbor’s plate tastier than my own, and in Western-style restaurants, where I have to choose just one from all the variety of delicacies on the menu, I get a little sad. In Chinese catering establishments there is no such problem: several dishes are always ordered (and their number, as a rule, is 2-3 more than the number of people sitting at the table), which are placed in the middle, and you get something like a mini buffet. In this situation, firstly, it is possible to try much large quantity dishes, secondly, even if some of them are not to your taste, you definitely won’t leave hungry, since you will certainly like something, thirdly, economically such dinners turn out to be more profitable, because the amount of the check is usually divided into all eaters.

My attitude towards Chinese cuisine is ambiguous: some dishes I enjoy with pleasure (pork with the aroma of fish), others seem rather dull to me (all sorts of soups with bland noodles), and there are some whose existence I cannot justify at all (smelly tofu), but the form of collective nutrition itself appeals to me. In addition, here you can practically not worry about observing table etiquette - no special forks for oysters and bowls for rinsing your fingers - only chopsticks, only hardcore. All scraps, shells, bones and napkins, as a rule, are thrown directly onto a table covered with cellophane film, or onto the floor. From an aesthetic point of view - outrageous, from a convenience point of view - just right. If, like me, you have manners a little worse than the Queen of England, you will be quite comfortable in a Chinese restaurant.

2. Hard work

Although, perhaps, this is not entirely correct: the Chinese (as, indeed, most representatives of other nationalities) are not distinguished by their love of work; but their ability to do boring and monotonous work for a long time and patiently is sometimes amazing. The most striking example is, of course, work in production. The wages of workers in Chinese factories are very low, the working conditions, to put it mildly, are not like a Google office, but where a Russian would drink himself to death, a Frenchman organized a trade union strike, and a German started optimizing, the Chinese calmly work shift after shift, often staying overtime to earn more money . More than the opportunity for creative self-expression, career prospects and all sorts of challenges so dear to the European heart, the ordinary Chinese value stability. As long as the work brings stable income, no matter how boring it may be, they will plow, eat unleavened rice and be happy with what they have - sometimes it seems to me that this can be envied. The quality of the work they do is another matter...

3. Tolerance

In China, throughout its history, there have never been religious wars. Well, for example, they drove Buddhists to Tang, because they were big fans of living freely on alms, and there were not enough workers; Well, they banned the Falun Gong sect, because there’s no point in throwing a barrel at the Communist Party... but bloody conflicts based on the fact that in one village the goddess Guanyin is depicted with 6 arms, and in another - with 8, have never happened here. As long as your beliefs are not threatened national security and do not involve violations of the law - you can believe in whatever you want. In China, in my experience, they are quite tolerant of gays (at least in big cities) and other minorities. I have a feeling (perhaps wrongly) that here they are very tolerant of physical disabilities, so people are much less inhibited. On the streets and in parks, many people dance, sing out loud, practice qigong, and no one condemns anyone for extravagance. It's a little strange, but overall it's probably great.

4. Friendliness and hospitality

This is probably back side lack of personal space, but this does not change the essence. The Chinese are very open people, always ready to help, show directions, and invite you to lunch. They smile a lot and rarely get angry. Being a foreigner here, I often encounter curiosity (sometimes excessive), but never aggression. When you come to a Chinese person’s home, he tries very hard to do everything to make the guest comfortable and well-fed.

Something like this... I wanted to add a dozen “buts” to each point, but I tried to somehow stay positive. Here are some bai aunties with oranges to make it completely joyful.

Eastern countries have a fundamentally different approach to sex than Western ones. What's the difference?

One of the features Chinese tradition- an inextricable connection between spiritual and sexual relationships. It was this connection that created the unique sexual culture of the Chinese - an organic part of the system of spiritual and physical improvement of a person. In China there is no cult of sexual pleasure, but there is also no hypocrisy born of fear of the power of the body. The Chinese attitude towards sex is more practical and chaste. Sex in China is a common part of life, from which you can derive a lot of useful and pleasant things.

Chinese sexual culture

Chinese sexual culture has a Taoist basis and combines the unity of three directions: morality (feelings must be permeated with consciousness), revelation (both aesthetic and the revelation of holiness and immortality) and benefit (health promotion).

For Chinese sexual relations have long been the most obvious and pure embodiment of the interaction of the cosmic forces of yin and yang for the purpose of obtaining energy. In Chinese sex there are a lot of ceremonies and rituals, elements of play and intrigue as a result of the desire to prolong the pleasure.
A woman is an equal sexual partner, so the issues of how to win over a woman for sex and satisfy her have received a lot of attention in Chinese literature.

In the East there is no distinction between divine and sexual grace. The birth of a child has always been seen as an indicator of beneficial energy. If a person has many children, then he is both sexually and spiritually very strong. The strength and power of the Chinese emperor was assessed primarily by the number of children.

Sex as art

IN Taoist practice sex is a great art. But the main goal was to prolong life. It was believed that it was competent sexual behavior, and not diet, breathing exercises, sleep and daily routine are the foundation of longevity and health. It is no coincidence that the most ancient Chinese treatises are devoted not to philosophy, but to the art of intimate relationships.

Coitus in the East is devoid of sinfulness. And when there is no concept of sin, there is no prohibition. Unlike Western novels, where the curtain falls precisely when the couple turns out the lights, in Eastern literature sex is presented in full physiological detail and interspersed with descriptions of nature and philosophical reasoning.

Healing with sex

In China, in addition to the classical nuns - nigu - there is a special kind of novices. They undergo a long sexual education in the monastery. The mission of these novices, called “gui” (something like “spirits of sex”), is to heal through intercourse. Using special sexual skills, they draw out bad energy from the patient, giving healthy energy in return, and as soon as the man recovers, they leave him. It is noteworthy that Gui nuns, despite everything, are considered girls. “Sex perfumes” do not shine with beauty and, unlike geishas, ​​are not interested in the client’s money. They usually have a short crew cut, modest clothing and minimal makeup.

For an Eastern man, the voice of his partner is important. The ideal is extremely high, vibrating around one sound, like the chirping of a bird or the soporific murmur of a stream, a kind of background music, which, by the way, was specially taught to geishas. The higher the voice, the more masterfully the woman masters sexual technique. But the ligaments of a flirting man, on the contrary, are tuned to the lowest sounds.

Sex and gender

In the East, the concept of “non-traditional orientation” did not exist. Replacing a partner with a representative of the same sex was poetically called “changing the strings of the lute.” Incredibly, by the beginning of the twentieth century, 60-70% of Chinese women were engaged in same-sex love. Many images are devoted to such relationships, and without any touch of obscenity: this is not forbidden fruit, but a completely ordinary story.

Sex taboos

At the same time, in the East there are a number of conventions that are prohibited from breaking. For example, in the West, kissing a woman on the cheek when meeting or saying goodbye is quite decent. In the East, this is an indecent act.

There is a clear rule: sexual relations are not hidden, but also not mixed with ordinary life. This is why there should be no romance at work.

How did a Chinese man find his “soul mate”? There were special books with a lot of characteristics, including the shape of a woman’s eyes, her build, and even the direction of hair growth on her arms, which were used to calculate how suitable she was to this man whether it contains the correct energy.

Evgeniy Kulgavchuk, sexologist, psychotherapist, psychiatrist: “ Modern approach to sexual relations in China still bears the imprint of previous views. But, according to statistics, today the Chinese rank first among residents of other countries in terms of satisfaction with their sex life. This means that Western civilization has a lot to learn from the East.

IN sex life there are two components: hedonia and reproduction. The influence of culture and religion on sexual relationships has always been significant. There are sexophilic and sexophobic cultures. The first group includes China and India. In sexophilic cultures, a balance is maintained between hedonia and reproduction - however, some manifestations may go beyond our traditions. The second group is Europe. Russia during pagan times could be classified in the first group.

In my work, I often recommend both Western techniques (American sex therapy according to Masters and Johnson) and Eastern ones. I should note that eastern approaches are sometimes more effective, since they allow not only to improve sexual technique, but also help to properly tune in to intimacy. But you shouldn’t try everything that was once described. Much does not have a practical meaning, but a descriptive, cultural one. After all, the Earth was once considered flat, not round. Moreover, some techniques, such as excessive abstinence, can be harmful to men’s health, especially in old age.”

Taken from: medweb.ru

Comments

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• March 6, 2019
  

  According to Western scientists, no more than 45% of women aged 20 to 50 engage in regular intimate life, and for 30% of European women sex occurs periodically, the remaining 25% of women note that sex is absent or extremely rare in their lives.

• December 2, 2018
  

  Today you probably won't find modern girl, who has not asked this question at least once, and this is understandable. The time of puritanical foundations has long since sunk to summer and every girl who is working on a relationship strives for perfection in everything. Of course, this did not ignore the topic of sex.

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• November 6, 2018
  

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• October 17, 2018

Every time I come to China, I always go to the park. Parks in Beijing open early, some have free admission, others charge from 2 to 35 yuan, it depends on the size and attractions of the park. Chinese parks are very beautiful and really pleasant to be in. Everything is neat and made for people, the paths are lined with pebbles, the toilets are always clean, there are always small nooks and gazebos where you can relax and many areas for various activities. After visiting Beijing parks, you realize that we don’t really have parks in Moscow, everything is somehow awkward and not cozy, and there is practically no landscape design.

Of course, I am attracted to parks not so much by the landscape that is presented in oriental style, I have always been interested in Eastern practices, people, their traditions and way of life. The life and culture of Beijingers begins early in the morning from 5-7 o'clock, and at this time it is advisable to be in the park. The variety of forms of manifestation of human life is simply amazing. From singing, dancing, playing musical instruments, various sports games, which you won’t meet here, before classes Chinese gymnastics, tai chi, wushu and qigong. We Russians have never even dreamed of the absolute freedom and spontaneity with which the Chinese spend time in parks. For the Chinese, the park is leisure, but the most important thing is communication. Most of them are divided into small groups based on interests, but there are also quite large groups, in which the teacher teaches Tai Chi or Qigong classes. Many groups do Tai Chi with the sword fan. During group classes, the Chinese practically do not ask the teacher how to perform this or that movement; they simply strive to repeat the movements after the teacher. Therefore, for most people the movements turn out to be rather clumsy, however, I got the impression that the correctness of the movements does not particularly bother them. I observed quite strange things, two groups doing the same style nearby. The small group is led by an elderly master who has 40 years of training experience, he has only 3 people, and nearby, 30 meters away, there is a group of twenty people, led by a young athlete, 20 years old, dressed in wushu clothes, what he does is outwardly beautiful but stupid. The Chinese, like most Russians, pay attention to the external without noticing the internal. Training lasts for years, it’s hard to even call it training, people come every day in the morning and do the movements. I wouldn’t call it an activity, it’s more of a habitual pastime. They have no goal of learning as quickly and as best as possible. They do not have the desire to be the best and win everyone, or to be advanced in the spiritual, or in any other area. The Chinese enjoy the process itself; they are content with little; for them it’s just a way of life. This approach makes sense. There are practically no failures or disappointments. How often do we meet people who quickly get carried away by some activity, and then do not receive quick results get disappointed and change their hobby to another, and then become disappointed in everything and in their life!? In our culture, people don’t live much in the present; they think about the future all the time, and when they get old, they think about the past. In China, people are freer, despite the fact that living there is more difficult, but they live and value the present time. I saw a lot of elderly people in parks, but their eyes were naive and spontaneous; they enjoyed life; I practically never saw sad faces. Evening and early morning in Beijing are a special time in which the life and culture of the Chinese are most clearly manifested. As for our Wushu classes, they are very different from those in China, this is primarily due to a different perception of the surrounding World. However, by studying another culture we become spiritually richer, expand our horizons and also achieve freedom.